1. The Downer
You’re here to go on the vacation of a lifetime. But Lauren is here to “find herself” after a dramatic breakup. And boy oh boy, get ready to hear all about it.
2. The Freaker-Outers
UGH. Chill OUT. Just because some tiny minor thing went wrong it is no reason to get hysterical. Another reason to chill the hell out? Contiki has on-the-ground experts who can help you solve any problem you run into.
3. The Nervous Traveler
Julie didn’t bring enough anti-anxiety meds, because there aren’t enough anxiety meds in the world to make Julie fun to travel with. On the other hand, if you love hearing endless international crime statistics and air-disaster predictions, you can’t pick a better sidekick.
4. The Hypochondriac
Trent brought water from home because he just can’t risk it. He either has bird flu or he’s a little bit hungover; He just can’t tell yet. Come to think of it, you’d better hope Trent is a hypochondriac, because if he’s as sick as he thinks he is, we’re all doomed.
6. Tiny Screaming People
Some people love kids. Some people — let’s put this politely — do not like kids that much. But no matter where you stand, nobody — NOBODY — loves traveling with someone else’s kids. Did we mention that Contiki is an 18+ kind of jam?
7. The Gone-Native Gals
You have been in France for one day and Jill and Nadia are already dressed like mimes, smoking Galoises and insisting everyone call them both Colette. But their tour companions are the lucky ones. Their friends back home are going to have to deal with their stupid affected French accent for weeks.
8. The Can’t-Leave-Work-At-Home Guy
HEY. HOTSHOT. Put down the Blackberry for a hot second and let me explain something to you. You can either go on vacation or spend all day yelling at your assistant back home, but you are not allowed to do both.