NASHVILLE, TN. The not-so-popular, but always colorful, Robert Pierce Mitchell, the fictional actor who portrayed 1980s cop, ‘Johnny Dynamo’, had a few choice words for Sylvester Stallone today, after it was announced that Stallone had bumped Bruce Willis from the cast of The Expendables 3 and brought in Harrison Ford as his replacement. Stallone made the announcement via Twitter on Monday calling Willis “greedy” and ‘lazy”. It took the fragile and fabricated actor less than 45 minutes to lash out at Stallone, calling the move to Ford a “disgrace” and a “downright slap in the face”. The Mitchell character is purported to be the original television action star, and his artificial show, Johnny Dynamo, was hyped to be the forerunner to the high octane action films that Stallone, Willis and yes, even Vin Diesel have cashed in on over the years. “What a joke”, Mitchell said, “I was the one who got these guys crashing cars and blowing up buildings. Now they don’t even think about me, let alone acknowledge my paving the way for them. I should have been the first guy Stallone called when he started all this Expendables business”. Even for a fictional character, it’s apparent that Robert Pierce Mitchell harbors quite a bit of hostility for real action stars like Sylvester Stallone and Bruce Willis. But Mitchell’s mythical success was in television and not feature films. “That’s just semantics”, Mitchell was quoted as saying. “It’s all the same now anyway. There was nothing but guys riding horses in Gunsmoke before Johnny Dynamo came along. It was because of me there were shows like Miami Vice and Magnum P.I. As a matter of fact, that Tom Selleck guy would have been nothing if he didn’t steal my mustache”. While he may be fake, Mitchell doesn’t really see it that way. “Look, I might not be real, but there’s people that email in everyday that seem to remember Johnny Dynamo, why ruin it for them? As long as people think they remember me, I might as well enjoy the ride”. Find out more about Robert Pierce Mitchell and Johnny Dynamo at

ComedyPizzaTV • 4 years ago