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1. A Tile Mate tracking device that will tell you via app whether your misplaced keys are hiding underneath your couch cushion (phew) or are currently en route to a Panera in a town you've never heard of (no god please no).
2. These incredibly sturdy magnetic floating shelves—just don't get carried away and use them as stairs for your 10lb cat to walk on?
3. This two-tiered wooden valet that you'll want to use just for its hypnotizing swivel.
4. A clip-on LED light that will make it much easier to locate the keys in your bag that are buried underneath a mountain of receipts, stray sticks of gum, and ticket stubs for 2009's Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Squeakquel.
5. These iron wall hooks you'll be hooked on. (But more importantly: Your keys will be hooked on them—not on the pocket lining of the coat you wore yesterday.)
6. This impressive piece of wall art because you just can't ~bear~ another trip to your neighborhood locksmith this month.
7. A set of four color-coded keychains that will beep when you hit a button on a remote control—so much fun, you'll want to lose your keys again, except don't!
8. A magnetic bullseye board for hanging keys, because if you get locked out of the apartment one more time your roommate will surely use you as a bullseye board.
9. An easy-to-mount shelf with hooks that will always keep your keys in plain sight ... if you keep your eyes open, bitch.
10. This little magnetic guy who is just really happy to be here and help you not blow this again.
11. A mirror with key hooks on it, so that whenever you're checking yourself out you can be like, "damn I look good but do I have my keys."
12. This slim leather wallet organizer, because maybe the ~key~ to not losing stuff is consolidating your personal items.
13. A retractable key reel, perfect for anyone who needs easy access to keys throughout the day or is just tired of muttering "not today satan" as they sit on the steps outside their locked apartment.
14. A nightstand with a single drawer that you will designate as The Key Drawer.
15. An expandable acrylic organizer you can attach to that drawer, if you insist on throwing other junk in with the keys.
16. This wiener dog that will remind you to hang up your keys, but won't be a dick about it.
17. An intricately patterned key box with two rows of hooks inside, if you really want to lean into this key storage thing.
18. This Mashiko ware dish that will make keeping track of your personal items as simple as its design.
19. A small cement tray to put on your nightstand and throw your keys on with all your loose change and pocket lint.
20. A mail organizer with hooks so you can hang up your keys as soon as you walk in the door from work with your mail (and then call Chris!).
21. A key holder that doubles as a bottle opener because, congrats, you didn't lose your keys today—pour yourself a cold one!
22. Everlane's modern take on the fanny pack, for when you need a lighter storage solution at an outdoor event or show.
23. This steampunk-inspired hook display because it's finally time to get your ass in gear.
The reviews for this post have been edited for length and clarity.