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1. Watch Ya' Mouth, an all-ages board game that'll have you cackling for days thinking about your mom trying to enunciate the phrase "pork belly buns for a party of 50" while wearing a mouthpiece.
2. A wireless karaoke microphone if — to the misfortune of your loved ones — you know the entirety of the Goo Goo Dolls discography by heart and have a mouth to scream-sing with.
3. A licking brush for your cat that is also, oddly, therapeutic for you.
4. A set of moldable mouth guards if you're tired of waking up feeling all sorts of pain from clenching your teeth overnight.
5. A stainless steel tongue scraper that'll kill mold and odors with hardly a ~lick~ of work.
6. A bourbon lip balm for the whiskey lover who wouldn't mind a scent trail lingering on them all day long.
7. Or, a value pack of Dr. Bronner's lip balms for the less adventurous.
8. Laneige Lip Sleeping Mask uses "Moisture Wrap" technology to seal in active ingredients so your lips emerge from your slumber feeling incredibly hydrated.
9. An "everything but the bagel" seasoning blend, if you've ever eaten an everything bagel and thought to yourself how nice it would be to give every meal the same seasoning treatment.
10. A dentist-recommended oral rinse to put an end to your days of bad, stinky breath.
11. Fenty Gloss Bomb Universal Lip Luminizer for "explosive" shine and shading that'll leave your lips looking fuller and smoother.
12. A sleek, double-walled drinking vessel that'll keep your bev hot for hours on end.
13. A candy box, if your "London Boy" is just a 10-pack of Cadbury chocolate bars in a trenchcoat.
14. MAC Cosmetics Pink Lipstick line comes in 23 hues and textures to shade, define, and showcase your lips.
15. Mike's Hot Honey, that'll add a perfect spicy-sweet kick to just about any dish.
16. A travel case of mint dental flossers so you can stay diligent with your dental hygiene when you're out of town.
17. The Clinique Chubby Color Lip Balm Set, which'll give you a bit of instant nourishment with its mango and shea butters. (Plus, some color that is the perfect balance of opaque and sheer.)
18. A charcoal-based toothpaste that'll actually *significantly* whiten teeth.
19. A water flosser that'll thoroughly clean all those hard-to-get nooks and crannies in your mouth. Try giving me anything less than an "A" on my next dentist check-up, I dare you!!!
20. A monthly subscription to Quip, the beautiful and award-winning electric toothbrush with a two-minute timer to effectively remove plaque and prevent gingivitis.
21. Or, an activated Japanese charcoal toothbrush — great for your gums and Instagram grid.
22. A caffeinated gum that'll make an incredible alternative to coffee and energy drinks when you inevitably hit that midday slump.
23. A set of reusable stainless steel straws that'll make for a much more environmentally friendly (not to mention, beautiful) drinking solution.
24. A cold-season tea made with eucalyptus, peppermint, licorice, and notes of ginger, cardamom, cinnamon, and clove so you can fight off your impending sickness before it gets out of hand.
25. And a coconut lip scrub that'll leave you with incredibly soft and moisturized lips.
Some reviews in this post have been edited for length and/or clarity.