cogamble

cole gamble

Cole Gamble’s writings on the crimes of Willy Wonka, man-eating beds and tales from his cringe-worthy life appear here on Babble, the humor site Cracked, The Daily Beast, The Huffington Post and Salon. He is working on a book entitled, Conquer Everything! A Self Help Book to Destroy All Other Self Help Books and Grant You Mastery in Everything.

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  • A teddy bear taking a selfie
  • A wooden post sticking out of the grass
  • A rainbow unicorn with an arrow pointing upward for a horn
  • A little cowboy with a big 'number one' hat crying for joy
  • Moses wearing sunglasses holding a list article carved into a tablet
  • Clipboard with a piece of paper on it that says 'do it to em', 'get stuff done', and 'be a legend'
  • The number one hundred thousand under a small green monster
  • The number two hundred and fifty thousand under an alien
  • The number five hundred thousand amongst a forest of eyeballs
  • The number one million on the earth, being watched by a planet sized eyeball
  • A person with their palms facing forward, wearing an uncooked turkey on their head
  • Butterflies flying around a pair of lips
  • A body builder cat flexing with 2022 written across its pecs
  • Snow White smiling serenely while looking at a bird that is perched on her hand
  • The golden snitch flying through the air
  • A green slime splatter
  • K-pop 'finger heart'
  • Funky disco dancer
  • A cat looking startled to see a human dressed as a cat eating from its bowl, labelled "Karen"
  • Two slimy tentacles touching and forming a heart shape
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  • Repeatedly Tasering Pregnant Women is OK, Says Court

    A court has ruled three police officers innocent of using excessive force after they Tasered a visibly pregnant woman pulled over for a speeding ticket. Run that by me again? What is it about “shooting electricity into a fetus” that sounds reasonable?

  • 9 Kids Charged After Bullied Classmate Commits Suicide

    In January, Phoebe Prince, 15, hung herself from a stairwell in her family home. A prosecutor claims the taunting and physical threats from nine teenagers pushed the young girl to take her own life. Another boy, 11, took his life in nearby Springfield last year after also facing fierce bullying.

  • Easter Peeps Gone WILD!!!

    Peeps. Good ‘ol wholesome, tasteless peeps. Easter would just be “Jesus day” without ‘em. But some out there, some with too much time on their hands and clearly an abundance of peeps have transformed them into so much more. Funny, scary, evil, terrible things.

  • May I Blow Your Pants Off? New PREDATORS Trailer

    Yes, I know. I’ve been posting a lot of movie and pop culture stuff recently. Is it my fault that there has been a swell of awesomeness as of late? Yes, it probably is. Anywho:

  • 90 Pound Toddler

    Pang Ya is only two and yet, at 90 pounds, she weighs as much as the average adult Chinese woman.

  • “Shocking” Teen Pregnancy Video Banned from You Tube

    A viral video of a school girl giving impromptu birth on a football field has been ripped off of You Tube for it’s shocking content. In the video, school kids flip out as a young woman pops a baby out on the 50 yard line, with graphic detail.

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