1. The cocoon that bookworms have been waiting for.
Bookworms aren't known for leaving the house, but not leaving the actual bookcase is some next-level commitment.
2. Any only child's pathway to euphoria.
You'll never have to share again with Ben & Jerry's "Euphori-lock." As the contraption states, "I'm terribly sorry, but there is no 'u' in 'my pint.'"
3. Shark boat. Shark boat! SHARK BOAT!
The best part about this thing is that it's exactly what you think it is: a customizable powerboat that allows you to both submerge and leap above water like a real (insert sea animal of choice here).
4. The most comfortable way to get in trouble.
Never study for a test again with these cheat-sheet T-shirts that are printed upside down to make even cheating easier. You can forget to study, just don't forget to do your laundry.
5. The four dollars that just cured childhood agony forever.
No more fistfuls of milk or buckets of tears crying over spilled milk. Haha, spilled milk. Get it?
6. The shining beacon to end bathroom blindness.
Gone are the days of not-so-quietly fumbling for the toilet paper when your honey is in the next room sleeping. Also, anything that glows in the dark is automatically 10x cooler.
7. The way to make a blushing bride's blood rush to her head even more.
A surefire way that no one will top (or bottom — depending what the gravity is like) your wedding, you can now get married in zero gravity.
8. The answer to "what's more ridiculous than a unicycle?"
The monowheel by Monovelo allows the rider to be the wheel. Laugh all you want, but they were used in the 2008 Olympics Opening Ceremony, so they have that going for them.
9. The healthy way to get a beer belly.
Have you been dying for a beer belly, but can't keep up with the heavy drinking? Not to worry, just strap one on and you too can blend in at your local tailgate.
10. An antisocial water sport enthusiast's best friend.
Who needs a friend to steer the boat when you can do it all yourself? Plus, no need to take turns!
11. Mother's intuition (in robot form).
A tiny happy robot that reminds you to do all the things that your mom would usually remind you to do. Another perk, unlike the real thing: You can turn this mother off whenever you want.
12. The ultimate way to make your friends love you and your neighbors hate you.
Take this BBQ dining boat out on the lake, catch a few fish, and grill them on the spot!