2. Exercise is key.
“I’M FEELING SKINNY TONY”
3. You can’t always judge a kid by his weight.
5. The opposite sex is totally attainable.
Camp Magnolia Girl #1: Why don’t those guys just lose weight?
Camp Magnolia Girl #2: Why don’t you show them how to throw up after meals like you did?
11. Some people are just naturally fucking crazy.
13. Knowing a foreign language will come in handy one day.
14. The PerkiSystem can help turn you into a skinny weiner.
“Time to wake up, campers! Today is evaluation day. The key word here is ‘value.’ Do you have any? Not yet! But before summer’s over, this camp’s gonna be filled with skinny winners!”
24. Being fat is embarrassing to your parents.
27. Never forget to stretch before you exercise.
“Congratulations, you’ve just joined the 76% of Americans who forget to stretch before doing any physical activity.”
33. Custodial services: someone’s gotta do it.
- The Clinton campaign is trying to stop television stations from running a pro-Trump ad featuring Michelle Obama.
- A group of UK Uber drivers have won the right to minimum wage and holiday pay in a landmark tribunal ruling 🚘
- A federal jury cleared the leaders of an Oregon standoff. The militia group took over a wildlife refuge last January.
- RIP — Vine says it's discontinuing its mobile app, effectively ending the 6-second video service 💀