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26 Hilarious Valentine's Day Tweets That'll Make You LOL Whether You're Single Or Taken

"Every Valentine's Day card in history was signed on the dashboard on a car in a Walgreen's parking lot."

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all of the posts on @1800flowers Facebook page are complaints. This guy didn't even use words, and its the best one.

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"Do you have a date for Valentine's Day?" Me: Yes... February 14th

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Me on Valentine's day: " This is a money making scheme we shouldn't be practicing it!" Also me on Valentine's day:

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Can we replace Valentine’s Day with another thanksgiving?

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Can't wait for Valentines Day. I'm gonna run into as many restaurants as I can shouting "Knew I'd find you here! You bastard" then run out.

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Being single is cool and all but like how am I gonna get a stuffed animal bigger than me on Valentine’s Day

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Are you excited for Valentine's Day? Me: 😭😭 😭 😭😭😭 😭 😭 😭 😭 😭 😭 😭 😭 😭… https://t.co/5kvGS4xQpj

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valentine’s day is approaching, but so is mcdonald’s monopoly and i’ll let you guess what i’m more excited for x

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if anybody wants to get me a valentine’s day present, i wear a size large in rent.

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Person: "You have any plans for Valentine's day?" Me:

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Me on a date with myself on Valentine’s day:

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Can we drop the pretense of "President's Day" and just call it "I needed a long weekend because Valentine's Day is garbage"

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“I don’t wanna ruin Valentine’s Day for y’all but February 14 is also on Ash Wednesday which means you can’t eat me… https://t.co/rLADOLp0tU

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Gearing up for yet another Valentine's night of complete & total romance

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me leaving instagram comments on Valentine’s Day

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Don't forget Rite Aid for all your Valentine's Day needs

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i dont need a valentine i need 8 million dollars and a fast metabolism

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"Actually, violets are violet," I say, ripping up her poem.

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the best thing about being single on valentine's day is I get to eat all 2 dozen of these roses by myself

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Joke's on you, people trying to make me feel bad about Valentine's Day -- I feel bad every day

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Every Valentine's Day card in history was signed on the dashboard on a car in a Walgreen's parking lot.

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how i’m gonna be on valentine’s day