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Posted on Dec 15, 2014

21 Things Only Type-A People Understand About Christmas

All I want for Christmas is everyone to follow my Christmas itinerary handouts.

1. Let's just start off by saying CHRISTMAS IS NOT A TIME OF PEACE FOR TYPE-As. Like it's seriously stressful having to organize the weeks leading up to the holiday.

2. It all starts December 26th-- the day you start planning your next Christmas. Are you staying home? Going out of town? In-laws' place? Hawaii? ABANDONING IT ALL AND STARTING A NEW LIFE WHERE CHRISTMAS ISN'T CELEBRATED!?!?!

3. Like it takes A WHOLE YEAR to plan everything about the holiday. Even the movies you watch during the holidays needs to be planned out.

4. Shit starts to get real on Black Friday. Like you NEED to get almost all of your Christmas shopping done THAT DAY.

5. And if you don't finish shopping on Black Friday, then you definitely will on Cyber Monday because any date later than that is WAY too close to Christmas.

6. Express shipping on online purchases is always A MUST. You ARE NOT going to risk the high-influx of holiday packages to mess up your Christmas itinerary.

7. Decorating your house is a SERIOUS and tumultuous task you literally have to stretch for. LIKE THIS ISN'T A GAME.

8. The lights outside HAVE to be strung on your gutters with care.

9. And, god forbid, if one lightbulb goes out, THEY'RE ALL COMING DOWN and will be immediately replaced.

10. When it comes to finding that one perfect Christmas tree, you seriously have to hope and pray that it'll be at the first lot you stop at because you DO NOT settle.

11. Just because you *finally* found that perfect tree, THE WAR ISN'T OVER. Now you have to decorate it evenly with ornaments that compliment your living room but isn't identical to last year's arrangement.

12. And OBVIOUSLY the ornaments have been sitting meticulously in storage awaiting your delicate hands to hang them again.

13. You quietly judge ANYONE who sends out their holiday cards after December 1st.

14. And the halfway-to-Christmas meltdown WILL inevitably happen and it WILL seriously freak you out.

15. Wrapping presents is a day-long event that you lock yourself in a room to do ALONE, because each present has to be worthy of sitting underneath your FLAWLESS tree.

16. And any holiday cooking is a daunting task because your festive food and treats are LEGENDARY.

17. Every year, Christmas Eve is the calm before the storm. You ALWAYS naively think to yourself "this won't be too bad..."

18. LOL NOPE-- Christmas finally arrives, and IT'S MADNESS. If people are coming over to your place, everything has to be SPOTLESS...

19. ... Or if you're celebrating it elsewhere, you need to know the details of what's going on ALL DAY and at ALL TIMES.

20. And NO MATTER WHAT, at the end of the day, you immediately start planning your next Christmas because you only have 365 DAYS LEFT.

21. But despite all the stress and holiday sweat, it's all worth it, because a "Type-A Christmas" is the only type of Christmas you'd ever want.

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