8 Questions Every Britney Spears Fan Needs Answered
Go call the police, go call the guvunuh.
1. Did a man named Wade Robson destroy Justney?
The public likes to think they know what led to the demise of the greatest power couple to have ever graced Hollywood -- Britney cheated on Justin with choreographer Wade Robson, Justin wrote "Cry Me A River" as a response to her infidelity, and in turn, Britney wrote "Everytime." None of these, however, has ever been really confirmed.
In 2011, Justin stated "Cry Me A River" was written after a fight he had with Britney, but he has never confirmed the rumor that Britney cheated on him. Furthermore, Britney claims the video, featuring a woman who looks eerily similar to Spears, was simply a publicity stunt. What's even more intriguing, shortly after the breakup, Justin told Barbra Walters in an interview, "I promised to her I wouldn't say specifically why we broke up."
2. Why does Britney's dad still have control over a 32-year-old?
In 2008, after Britney was placed on a 5150 psychiatric hold, a judge granted Britney's father, Jamie Spears, control of her career, personal life, and finances under a court-ordered conservatorship. This conservatorship was supposed to be temporary, but fast forward six years and homegirl has as much freedom as a 16-year-old.
Should a woman who is competent enough to judge a nationally syndicated singing competition, handle the pressures of performing an elaborate Las Vegas show for over two years, and continuously put out albums be forced to live such a controlled life? Where is Britney's mental state today and what do the courts know that's giving validity to her conservatorship? FREE BRITNEY.
3. Where the hell did the other half of the "Gimme More" music video go?
Everyone is familiar with Britney's stripper-tastic plotless video for "Gimme More," the lead single off the 2007 fan-beloved album Blackout. But the scrapped "Gimme More" video is rumored to be much more morbid.
Allegedly, the original video centers around Britney attending her own funeral. Previously never-before-seen footage shot for the video leaked in 2011, including footage of a Britney dressed in all black walking down the street, further fueling the funeral plot rumors. Why was this video so censored? What was the content of the original video that was deemed too dark to see the light of day?
4. Was there a second breakdown in 2010?
In December 2008, Britney made the biggest comeback in pop history with the release of her sixth studio album Circus led by the No. 1 single "Womanizer." It seemed Britney was piecing her life together after her highly publicized meltdown earlier in the year. Shortly after Britney's hugely successful worldwide arena tour The Circus Starring Britney Spears ended in 2009, there were reports (varying in reliability) of Britney acting erratic once again. Most notably, Britney was showing signs of strange behavior, similar to how she acted in 2007 during a trip to Starbucks caught by the paparazzi.
When Britney came back on the scene in 2011 to promote her album Femme Fatale, Britney looked visibly aged, sounded unusual in a promo for a Good Morning America performance, and gave nearly robotic and often lifeless interviews and performances. Was there something happening behind the scenes between the Circus era and Femme Fatale? More importantly, was Britney rushed too quickly back into the spotlight after her 2007 breakdown?
5. What the actual fuck is happening in the "Hold It Against Me" video?
One of Britney's most notable hits of the past few years is the sexually charged dance floor anthem "Hold It Against Me." Although the song is laced with sexual innuendoes and harsh dubstep beats, some seriously weird shit is going on.
In one scene, Spears finds herself surrounded by screens playing some of her most iconic music videos (so much flawlessness happening everywhere). But then things start to get weird when you realize she's wearing some sort of a giant, white gown WITH FACELESS MEN CRAWLING OUT FROM UNDER HER. LIKE, WUT?
Toward the bridge of the song, Spears' arms violently raise up as colorful liquid shoots out of her fingertips. It's super messy and the dress is totally ruined.
What's even more bizarre, for a split second before the liquid mess, her smile stretches, and it's insanely creepy. The video also features more "WTF" moments like Spears getting in a total bitch fight with herself, Spears surrounded by a halo of press microphones, what sounds like the word "robot" around the 3:11 mark, and, quite appropriately, ends with a giant question mark appearing on the screen.
Sure, many fans have analyzed the video for themselves, but nobody knows for certain what the actual fuck Britney was trying to tell everyone with this video.
6. Did a woman named Myah Marie actually sing Britney's last album Britney Jean?
Say the name "Myah Marie" around any Britney fan and it'll be enough to make them nauseous. Marie has become an infamous tool used by Britney's team to provide backup vocals for much of Spears' most recent music, as she has a remarkable knack to sing identically.
Since Spears' 2011 album Femme Fatale, allegations of Britney's team passing Marie's vocals as Britney's started surfacing. Despite Marie rejecting these allegations, the controversy picked up more steam when Spears released her latest album Britney Jean. The original stems (the different audio sources in a song, like the main vocals, backing vocals, etc.) from the song "Passenger" surfaced in an acoustic remix, proving there were parts where Spears' vocals were filtered in with Myah Marie's.
If Marie's vocals are disguised as Britney's on her supposed "most personal record yet," what's the point of even releasing an album? More importantly, how much of her new record does Britney actually sing?
7. Why doesn't Britney kill anyone in the "Perfume" music video?
Much like the "Gimme More" music video, "Perfume," the second single off of Britney's latest album Britney Jean, suffered from a messy plot that wasn't the original intent for the official music video.
Before the release, photos surfaced of Spears pointing a gun at the cheating beau on set of the music video. Fans couldn't wait to see this new "Breaking Badney" side of the singer. Unfortunately, when the final version was released, that scene was absent and the video ended up becoming a four-minute montage of a hopeless Britney crying. Needless to say, Britney fans had meltdowns for weeks. Joseph Kahn, the director of the video, has since tweeted about the original plot and hopes one day his director's cut is released.
8. What the hell happened to Britney's knee and did it ruin her dancing ability forever?
From the playful "Oops! I Did It Again" choreography on Mars to the sweaty "I'm A Slave 4 U" dance orgy, Britney's killer moves that accompanied the first five years of her career are arguably just as iconic as the singer's discography. However, it has been years since we've seen a performance where Spears actually brings it as hard as the schoolgirl did back in the day.
For example, the 2011 Femme Fatale Tour was plagued with stiff arm moves and nearly lifeless choreography. Even her current Las Vegas show "Piece of Me" leaves fans wanting a more animated Britney. Has she simply lost her passion? Her brutal knee injury back in 2004 on the set of the "Outrageous" music video could be a factor, or even the trauma from her breakdown in 2007.
Whatever the explanation is, it's unfortunate -- when Madonna was Britney's age, she was riding the success of "Like A Prayer" and putting out killer performances during The Blond Ambition World Tour. One thing is for certain, the golden age of Britney as a dancer has already passed and we might never know why.