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After The Rapture: Meet The Sweethearts of The Tribulation

Calling the Rapture "the end of the world" isn't entirely accurate. Only a select few will leave the planet on Saturday, but the rest of us have anywhere between five months and seven years of Hell on Earth to endure before Judgement Day. Better get to know your new masters.

  • The Four Horsemen Of The Apocalypse

    White, Red, Black, and Pale. They're kind of like the Power Rangers of damnation.
    They stand for Victory, War, Famine, and Death.

  • 7 Angels With 7 Trumpets

    These seven angels each hold a trumpet that when blown will trigger a unique form of devastation on our wicked planet. First trumpet: Hail and fire mingled with blood rain down on the earth. One third of the Earth, one third all the trees, and all of the grass will be burned up. Second Trumpet: Something like a great burning mountain falls into the sea. One third of the sea turns into blood. One third of all living creatures in the sea died. One third of all battleships destroyed. Third Trumpt: A meteor named Wormwood crashes into the sea and contaminates all of the water. Fourth Trumpet: One third of the day becomes night. So basically, it becomes winter. Fifth Trumpet: DEMON LOCUSTS! Sixth Trumpet: DEMON INVASION COMMENCES! This is truly the beginning of the end.

  • The Mighty Angel

    This guy's job is to take possession of the Earth and make sure the sinners are still suffering. He only plays a minor role in the interlude between the 6th and 7th trumpets; just after the demon locusts and just before the rest of the demons.

  • The Woman And The Seven-Headed Dragon

    Many have interpreted the woman to represent the nation of Israel and the dragon to represent Satan.

  • The 7-Headed, 10-Horned Beast Of The Sea

    The dragon has a buddy, another beast with seven heads and ten horns rises out of the sea like a scene out of Godzilla. He's supposed to be The Antichrist with a confederation of 10 kings.

  • The Great Whore And The Red Beast

    Instead of rising out of the sea, this beast rises out of the earth. Again, there are seven heads and 10 horns.  The Whore is Babylon, or the symbol of decadence and greed. This beast is the False Prophet, or the Antichrist's personal hype man.

  • The 2nd Coming Of Jesus

    Shooting a laser out of his mouth, a white-haired Jesus finally shows up to the party. He kills all the baddies then establishes a kingdom of heaven on earth for 1000 years. Good times.

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