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15 Signs You're A Coffee Snob

Coffee is an art, and you've got your master's degree. You'll only drink the finest brew in town, so why not transport it in style with a Comfort Cup® by Chinet® insulated cup. Just watch out for the #cuparazzi.

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1. This is what your nightmares look like.

United Artists / Via

2. You own a specialized coffee apparatus that looks basically medical.

Chun-Hung Eric Cheng @ Blue Bottle Coffee / (CC BY http://2.0) / Via Flickr: 72922885@N00

3. You use more than six words to order your drink...

4. ...but at your local coffee shop, you don't have to say anything at all.

Your barista knows your order. You have a secret handshake. They may even know your blood type.

5. You've been doing pour-over for years.

m anima / (CC BY http://2.0) / Via Flickr: banky177

6. You think it should be legal to punch people who say "expresso" square in the face.

7. Somebody gets you a personalized cupping spoon every single birthday.

Bella Jackson Studios / Via

8. You could watch this GIF all day.

9. Commercial coffee chains are almost always the last option.

Exception: when traveling somewhere you don't know the best places to get coffee — then they're a haven.

10. You keep your own French press at your desk because it's better than all the other French presses.

bfishadow / (CC BY http://2.0) / Via Flickr: bfishadow

11. You tip your barista more than you tip your waiter.

What? They're artists.

12. Milk? In coffee? You'd rather stab yourself in the eye with a stirrer.

13. Yeah, you grind your own. Obvi.

Dennis Tang / (CC BY-SA http://2.0) / Via Flickr: tangysd

14. And when you're done, you confidently use pick-up lines like this:

Christine Rondeau / (CC BY http://2.0) / Via Flickr: crondeau

15. Instant coffee: just no.

Toddlers and Tiaras / TLC / Via