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    33 Sentences You'll Only Understand If You're In A Book Club

    "I'm going to book group" is code for "I will come to work hungover tomorrow."

    Alexander Solodukhin / Ben White / Muhammad Haikal / Tamarcus Brown / Chelsey Pippin / BuzzFeed

    1. "I've got my book group tonight." – "I'm going to get really drunk on house red and pretend I'm fancy and cultured."

    2. And "I just finished it today, actually!" – "I skipped from page 23 to the end on the bus here."

    3. "So what did everyone think?" – "I did not understand this book, please explain it to me."

    4. "Yeah, I liked it." – "I don't have anything constructive to say about it, but it was fine."

    5. "I definitely wouldn't have picked it but I'm glad I read it." – "Natalie is never allowed to pick the fucking book ever the fuck again."

    6. "I can't believe that ending!" – "I don't know how it ends, hahahaha."

    7. "I totally agree!" – "I didn't read it but what you said sounds really smart."

    8. "So, I personally found it really interesting that..." – "I am showing off because I both read and understood this book."

    9. "Ohh... interesting point." – "I totally disagree but I'm not here to start a fight."

    10. "I totally didn't read it that way." – "FIGHT ME."

    11. "I mean it was fine." – "That was the worst effing book I've ever read in my life."

    12. "May run a bit late tonight." – "I didn't read the book and I'm hoping you will be done talking about it by the time I arrive."

    13. "Ugh it's been a crazy month I completely ran out of time to finish it." – "I didn't want to read this stupid book so I didn't."

    14. "Shall we do a short one next month?" – "I'm not reading more than 250 pages."

    15. "Did anyone see the film version?" – "I watched the film instead of reading the book."

    16. "I WILL finish it though." – "I will definitely never touch this book again."

    17. "Oh, I got a copy of the new Ian McEwan for Christmas, I'd love to read that next!" – "I'm broke and don't want to pay for a book."

    18. β€œI thought it was a bit anticlimactic.” – β€œI rushed to the end and I’m not sure I followed it at all.”

    19. β€œI read it on audiobook.” – β€œI probably zoned out during the big twist reveal and completely misunderstood the book.”

    20. β€œIt was a bit wanky, if you ask me.” – β€œA very obviously straight white rich man wrote this book about straight white rich men.”

    21. β€œI wish there had been more women in it?” – β€œOMG this was suuuuuch a sexist book.”

    22. β€œI guessed the twist like two pages in.” – β€œI had a vague inkling that something like that was going to happen right before it did, but I still feel really smug about that.”

    23. β€œYou can see that the author was really influenced by Joyce.” – β€œI want everyone to know (or think) I read Ulysses.”

    24. β€œThe writing was just really bad wasn’t it?” – β€œI actually started writing a book myself because I figured β€˜hey, if this guy can do it.’”

    25. β€œShall we pick our next book off the Man Booker list?” – β€œI am such an insufferable asshole.”

    26. β€œHas anyone actually read a book with GOOD sex scenes?” – β€œI read 50 Shades of Grey and was actually kinda turned on by it but I don’t want to admit it.”

    27. β€œHaha, oh my God, I know! That book you mentioned IS terrible.” – β€œAh shit I love that book.”

    28. β€œSo what should we read next?” – β€œFor the love of God someone else pick a book because I don’t want to take the blame in case it’s bad.”

    29. β€œI heard really good things about the new Ali Smith.” – β€œIf we don’t read the new Ali Smith next I will hold it against you all for the next year at least.”

    30. β€œLet’s make it an early one tonight.” – β€œI need to feel like I at least tried to be a responsible adult even though I’m definitely going to get sloshed at book club drinks.”

    31. "More wine?" – "It’s the point in the evening when we descend to slagging off Twilight."

    32. β€œTwilight is soooooo bad.” – β€œI once owned a Team Jacob t-shirt."

    33. β€œShall we do it over dinner next time?” – β€œWe will keep meeting in shit pubs with no food and end up in McDonald’s after for eternity.”

    34. β€œSee you next month?” – β€œLet’s meet up in between and not even pretend to talk about books.”

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