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    Posted on Sep 30, 2015

    23 People Anyone Who's Stayed In A Hostel Will Recognise

    "I could never work at a desk, man."

    1. The Early Bird

    Channel 4

    I mean, kudos to this guy for being so committed to exploring the city that he'll wake up at the crack of dawn to do it, but does he really need "Who Let the Dogs Out" a his alarm tune?

    2. The Night Owl


    The Early Bird's bastard cousin is guaranteed to burst through the door, drunk and ready give a play-by-play of their night to the dorm, at the very second you've finally fallen asleep. Bonus points if they're sick all over the dorm floor and you have to turn all the lights on.

    3. The "Musician"


    They hang out moodily on the stoop and play "Wonderwall" in the common room every fucking day.

    4. The Couple


    You're happy for them you guess. But shouting "get a room" when they start getting hot and heavy doesn't really have the desired effect when all the rooms are 8 bed dorms.

    5. The Quarter Life Crisis


    They were two years into an entry level job and it kind of made them want to die, so they abandoned ship and now they're on a journey to find themselves, and they can't WAIT to tell you about it.

    6. The Trust Fund Kid


    There's always one with unlimited funds slumming it with the budget travel crowd for street cred. Which can be kind of cool actually, especially if they're generous, but can be a drag when they set the night's agenda and the drink prices are STEEP.

    7. The Casanova


    He thinks he's God's gift to women on a world tour, and, OK, he's fit, but nobody would complain if he toned the People's Sexiest Man Alive stuff down just a little, amiright?

    8. The Loner

    Warner Brothers

    What's there to say, you don't know anything about them except that you wish they showered just a bit more often.

    9. The Lizzie McGuire


    She's a nice girl, more often than not from Midwest America, and she's come for adventure, love, and maybe to accidentally become a international pop star or discover she's got a long lost rich relative in a faraway land. Tune into her weekly travel blog to find out.

    10. The Shower Hog


    Did this guy even rent a bed???

    11. The Breakfast Hog


    You know the ones. They bring Tupperware and stash away all the complimentary breakfast goodies for themselves because they read somewhere it's a great a "hack" to save money on food while travelling. Here's a better hack: don't let the rest of us starve, ok, thanks.

    12. The Digital Nomad


    They've wrangled some remote job and you secretly wonder if they're actually being paid to say stuff like "I don't know how anyone could work at a desk, man," and "It changed my life and you can do it too!" SOMEBODY HAS TO WORK IN THE OFFICES OF THE WORLD GUYS. It's a fact.

    13. The Dumpster Diver


    Slightly better than The Breakfast Hog to be honest, but maybe a little TOO committed to a low-budget travel experience for your taste.

    14. The Name Dropper


    They want to prove they're the most well-travelled person in the hostel or DIE. TRYING.

    15. The "Cool Girl"


    She can out-drink everyone at the club and still walk all the way back to the hostel in heels, no problem. She doesn't do ~drama~, has a lot of random friends whose parties she's always inviting her dorm mates along to, and she's really into talking about herself and how chill and easy going she is.

    16. The Stoner

    Warner Bros

    You know them by the smell, you know them because you never see them awake before 1pm, you know them because they're always generous but they'll never remember your name.

    17. The Staffer

    They're getting a sweet deal and they know all the good tips about the area, but they're also pretty jaded and annoyed by your mess, so you never know what side you're going to get.

    18. The Left Swipe

    No matter how many times you tell them you're not here to hook up, they just keep trying to wear you down.

    19. The Mary Poppins


    Somehow they managed to jam every single thing they own into their mega-sized suitcase and then it ends up strewn all over the floor of your dorm. Just wait 'til they start buying souvenirs!

    20. The Group Mum


    Everyone loves her because she's always on top of walking the drunkest back to their bunks and she bakes in the communal kitchen, but she's also always in everyone's business all the time and can't she just LAY OFF or at least offer to do your laundry?

    21. The Hermit


    They never leave and you're not really sure what they're doing but they keep to themselves so you guess it's okay.

    22. The Nudist


    I mean, who doesn't like to wake up to a stranger's junk in their face while they climb down from the top bunk?

    23. The Local

    Warner Bros

    They've got a permanent job and life within driving distance, but they just never bothered to look for a proper place to rent. Maybe they get a kick out of the hostel life, maybe the hostel is ACTUALLY cheaper than rent, or maybe they just forgot to leave? You're not really sure, and neither are they.

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