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1. A faux book display that — first and foremost — actually hides cords, cables, and even your router in its hollow interior. It's the easiest way to return to your living room to your OG vision!
2. A lively monstera sure to be the talk of the town (aka your home) when it unfurls a new leaf. Remember when you were six and hatched your own butterfly from a chrysalis? This is just like that...but maybe even better.
3. A set of animal kingdom wall hooks that'll serve as doormen so visitors can check in their keys and coats. Now, what should you name them...? Something to think about. 🤔
4. A chrome table lamp that'll take your apartment from cute and well decorated to — BAM — five-star hotel in no time.
5. A Boy Smells candle guaranteed to have guests paying literally no attention to any of your decor as they'll be busy searching your home for the intoxicating scent that hit their nose the moment they walked in the door.
6. A pink serving tray that — when filled with homemade margs — will be the only thing anyone is focused on.
7. A cheetah throw so eye-catching, you can artfully arrange it on the arm of your sofa and call it quits on your decorating spree.
8. A wicker wall mirror you and your guests will get lost staring at yourselves in. Why did you come in this room, again???
9. A sparkly cowgirl wall clock if your aesthetic can best be described as Dolly Parton-inspired. It'll be getting so much attention your router will be singing 🎵 "Do I Ever Cross Your Mind?"🎵
10. A pillow-top accent chair so plush, it'll feel like you're sitting on a cloud and I mean a puffy cumulus one, not a thin lil' cirrus one. Just don't be surprised if guests ask if they can sit before doing so because it definitely looks like a show piece.
11. A minimalist-meets-industrial bookshelf where you can display the greenery and books you *do* want people to look at.
12. A stack of decorative books you can place on any unassuming surface be it a coffee table, floating shelf, or dresser. Neutral colors = très chic.
13. A trio of starburst mirrors capable of zhuzhing up bare wall space. You can even get multiple packs and create a whole gallery wall that'll not only add visual interest, but throw lots of light.
14. A mini re-creation of Michelangelo's David that you can use as a statement piece, bookend, vase, or even a remote control holder because those suckers are never where they're supposed to be.
15. A macramé basket that not only looks cute, but is deep enough to hide other items you've been too lazy to actually put away. Shoes, cords to electronics, random unmatched socks, and that stack of mail you *swear* you'll eventually go through can all be hidden at the bottom of this bad boy right before guests arrive!
16. A ceramic vase with abstract etched faces that catch the eye and hold it. Use it as a centerpiece on your dining room table or on an entryway console where it can complement your trinket tray and other accessories.
17. A handmade jesmonite bookend (or two) sure to draw some serious attention to your collection and make certain everything stays in its place.
18. A crescent-shaped catchall dish that'll not only add a little somethin' somethin' to your entryway console or coffee table, but give you a place to home other random knickknacks that looks a little more purposeful than wherever they were strewn about before.
19. An Article Timber sofa with buttery soft cushions that visitors will instantly sink into. I'm serious, I mean instantly.
20. An iridescent acrylic table that'll throw light all over your space even if you only have one unobstructed window because your other one is harboring an AC unit.
21. A floral storage bench where you can hide away other items that clash with your artistic vision. You know, like your favorite throw blanket — the one you cuddle with every day but don't keep on the couch because it has a noticeable ketchup stain.
22. A retro-style print that'll fit your mid-century aesthetic but also speak to your modern TV and film tastes (read: Cillian Murphy in a newsboy cap).
23. A patterned pouf guests can kick their feet up on once you're all ready to focus on what you gathered for: a Degrassi marathon.
24. A trio of tapered brass candle holders that will look smart as ever on your mantel. Light 'em up and they'll be even more impressive.
25. A woven wall tapestry to add a pop of color and texture to your gallery wall. If your guests are anything like me, they'll probably get up to run their fingers through it.
26. A mid-century/farmhouse/industrial-style end table with modified hairpin legs and a wire basket shelf where — if you're a millennial going on 60 like me — you can stow away the NYT crossword books you like to do in front of the TV.
27. An upholstered tub chair that is giving major That '70s Show vibes. If only it came with my #1 childhood crush, Eric Forman (aka Topher Grace). He'd def distract from anything else going on.
28. A mirrored bar cart where you can artfully arrange all of your spirits, mixers, and muddlers. If you want to get really Khloe Kardashian with it, you can even organize lemon and lime slices in little glass jars just like she does her Oreos.
29. A geometric pillow cover that gives me serious '90s Nickelodeon vibes. And I mean that in the best way possible, obvs.
30. A few clear acrylic frames so you can display your latest and greatest art finds from Etsy. They'll draw the eyes up, up, up, instead of to your overcrowded power strip.
31. And a custom room divider so if all else fails, you can tuck your cords and cables away in a space that's completely partitioned off from your well-thought-out scheme.
You coming to terms with the fact that can't just throw out your router because you dooo kind of need it to WFH and — more importantly — stream The White Lotus.
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