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The Great Panda Conspiracy

The mayor of D.C. doesn't want the city to shut down next week for reasons bigger than we ever could have imagined: fear of a panda takeover. Thanks to Mike Madden for this invaluable information that will effect our nation.

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Still don't believe me? Check out this agenda sent by an anonymous undercover spy...

PDA (Panda Detective Agency)

This reads:

1. Turn off camera

2. Collect camera equipment

3. Rebuild to use on hoomans (translation: humans)

4. Put hoomans in zoo

5. Observe

6. Collect CASH MONEY