21 Things That Happen In Every Movie Adam Sandler Makes Nowadays

Product placement… product placement everywhere.

1. Sandler plays a sarcastic middle-aged everyman who dresses like he’s recruiting for a college fraternity.

Jack and Jill (Happy Madison Productions)

2. He has an extremely attractive wife, who exists solely to look nice, laugh at his jokes and occasionally move the plot along.

Grown Ups 2 (Happy Madison Productions)

3. He lives in a sprawling palatial mansion.

Jack and Jill (Happy Madison Productions)

4. His vast wealth is explained by a high-powered media job that he seems in no way qualified for.

Click (Happy Madison Productions)

5. It’s probably a job in advertising, or some other industry that will allow Sandler to crowbar in a ridiculous amount of product placement.

Grown Ups (Happy Madison Productions)

6. At the outset of the film, Sandler’s boss tells him he needs to secure The Big Contract.

Click (Happy Madison Productions)

7. Overwhelmed by the task, Sandler seeks advice from his bumbling, layabout friends.

Grown Ups (Happy Madison Productions)

(All of whom are played by Sandler’s co-stars from Saturday Night Live.)

8. They fart a lot, which is of course hilarious.

Grown Ups (Happy Madison Productions)

9. Without warning, they all jet off to an exotic, far-flung destination, for no apparent reason.

Blended (Happy Madison Productions)

10. There, a second female character is introduced (in slow motion) giving Sandler and his buddies twice as many opportunities to make misogynistic jokes.

Just Go With It (Happy Madison Productions)

11. Sandler expresses his excitement about this by being really loud all the time.

Bedtime Stories (Happy Madison Productions)

12. The second female character initially dislikes Sandler, but soon falls head over heels in love after seeing how good he is with kids.

Just Go With It (Happy Madison Productions)

13. The kids in question swear a bit.

Blended (Happy Madison Productions)

14. One of Sandler’s real-life famous friends shows up for an inexplicable cameo.

Jack and Jill (Happy Madison Productions)

15. An animal urinates on Sandler’s face.

Grown Ups 2 (Happy Madison Productions)

16. The action comes to standstill as an entire scene is devoted to promoting a fast food chain.

Blended (Happy Madison Productions)

17. Or a water park.

Grown Ups (Happy Madison Productions)

18. Either Peter Dante (left), Allen Covert (right), or — more likely — both, appear at this point.

Big Daddy (Happy Madison Productions)

19. The story suddenly gets back on track, as Sandler wins The Big Contract, despite committing absolutely no time or effort to the project.

Click (Happy Madison Productions)

20. He also learns The True Meaning of Happiness.

Happy People (Happy Madison Productions)

21. Then Rob Schneider turns up and gives a performance that could be construed as possibly a bit racist. The end.

I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry (Happy Madison Productions)

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