Email from Kyra to James:
We should have stayed in bed today. Not a horrible day, just super busy and I'm exhausted. Need a second wind in me so I'm ready to face the cowboys tonight. Hope you have a good time with your friends tonight, I'll talk to you later. xo
Email reply from James to Kyra:
You chose to be exhausted today, Kyra. At your request, and because your house was cold an empty, you went out to drinks and dinner, on me, last night. I paid for everything, as I almost always do, and you didn't say thank you.
At 10:00PM, I said I wanted to go to bed and you asked me to watch Season One, of "The Office," with you. After you started the first two episodes, I turned out the lights, telling you that you could watch it upstairs, and you called me an "asshole" and suggested I sleep on the main level of my own house, and not in a bedroom. This was the second time you called me an an "asshole," this week. The first time was when I told you I didn't know the season record of your favorite football team.
Amazingly, you stayed up until 11:30, insisting on watching episode three of "The Office," entranced like you always are when you watch television, which you spend a lot of time doing. You admitted to me already that you have seen the episodes you watched.
You set your alarm for 6:00AM today; and when it went off, waking me up, you turned it off, and went right back to sleep, until I turned on the light in the room, as I was unable to go back to sleep.
We work in very different work environments, Kyra. My counter-parties (the people against whom I represent the government) are bankers and lawyers at some of the best firms in America; and they are some of the smartest, best-educated people who have ever lived in our country, as are my own co-workers and bosses. Everyday, I review and prepare very complex financial and legal analysis and I draft or interpret very complex legal documents. I have to explain these documents / analysis ad hoc, in public settings, or to my boss or his boss, who are in the top 15 most important people in my 3,000-person organization. People expect me to be precise and accurate. I have no opportunity to make mistakes, and no one checks my work, while I do check the work of others. If I make a mistake, it can have serious consequences for my organization and my career.
Sleep is vital to my health and happiness, and the last thing I want to do is stay up and watch television, when I should be asleep or preparing for my day at work.
So, read your message below, again. Does it make sense? You are the reason that you and I were exhausted today.
Goodnight,
James
And wait for it......
Kyra's Response:
Okay, let's just get a few things straight.
I do remember saying thank you, first of all. As I told you before, I am more than capable of paying myself and will happily do so. The only reason I let you last night is because when we planned the night, you said "if you come it's on me", and so I thought you wanted to. And I also thought you wanted me to come out with your friends, as you invited me and I did not invite myself - it was not because my house was cold and empty but because I wanted to spend time with you, because I enjoyed my time with you and I thought you did as well. I guess I am wrong because the rest of your message sounds like you do not.
To your next point, you asked me if I'd like to watch a movie at 9, not 10, and I said I'd rather watch a tv show. At 10, we did go up to bed. And I apologize for calling you an asshole, jokingly. You should have spoke up then, saying it upset you. The part about you sleeping on the couch was a joke too. I am a very sarcastic person and I always have been; I do not mean to upset people but I appreciate when people speak up because I will always respect that.
Also, I am sorry that you are so disappointed in the fact that I enjoy watching television before I go to bed at night. I don't do this every night, but since it was your suggestion to watch it on your tablet, I said sure, why not. This doesn't make me a bad person, watching television. And I'm not going to feel guilty for watching some relaxing television before bed because my profession takes a huge chunk of my mind throughout the day. And a lot of times, I am watching the news or travel channel documentaries; I also like to read and write at night (I am writing a novel, by the way) ; but my guess is that probably surprises you that I do because at times it does seem that you question my intelligence. And if you are wondering, here are some fun facts: I graduated graduate school with a 4.0, got a 1400 on my SATs, was in the top 5% of my graduating class, and I have an IQ of 130. Take that.
As far as your job, which is obviously the most important job that anyone has ever had (sarcasm again; my apologies, I know it's difficult for you to understand), you can go ahead and fuck yourself. That is the most arrogant thing I have ever heard. To think that my job is not difficult and stressful, you are completely wrong. I have a job which, though at times seems I am in over my head, is the most gratifying part of my life. I love those kids and I do so much for them, and no, I don't get paid enough, as much as you may think educators have it fine. If you are going to downplay my career in any fashion, I have no respect for you at all. Maybe someday if you have a child with a disability, you will look back and consider yourself foolish as well.
So, once again, I am oh so very sorry that I was such an inconvenience for you last night and this past month. See, that's that sarcasm I told you about before, if you didn't catch on. I am also sorry that your idea of dating is to see how hard you can judge someone and then send them an e-mail telling them all the things you don't like about them (but you love my butt, so I guess it's okay). Please note that if you truly feel that this kind of mean-spirited communication is okay, you will most likely be single for a very long time. I suppose at this point, I could backlash and tell you every little detail that's "wrong" with you, but I won't. I feel that everyone should be allowed to be who they are - people who mind won't matter and people who matter won't mind. However, I am going to go ahead and state that you are in fact an asshole, and this time, I am not being sarcastic. I have gone on bad dates and I have dated not so great guys, but I have never had someone be as critical and condescending as you just were.
In conclusion, I would like to let you know that I will not, under any circumstance, accept a man speaking to me in this way, ever. Therefore, I am officially cutting ties with you. Because I doubt there is anything you do like about me (since watching TV and working at a school are such intolerable personality flaws that pretty much say all there is to say about a person), I hope that you will not mind.
Oh and before I forget, thank you for the dinners. I do appreciate them and I did enjoy them. However, I am not interested in your company any longer, so don't worry, you can keep your money in your pocket.
Have a great life; I do mean that. I am truly disappointed that it had to end this way and I was not planning on it. I would prefer to do this face to face. However, since you didn't have the balls to say how you were feeling when you saw me last night, I had no choice but to bring myself down to your level.
Goodbye.
Kyra
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