21 Insults That Are Worth Taking Notes Over

    "Your family tree is a wreath."

    It never hurts to have a few zingers in your back pocket, you know, to neutralize the haters.

    So redditor u/sharktoothsoup asked the web: "What's your favorite insult?"

    And all levels of burns came rolling in. Check out the top answers below!

    1. "I envy people who don't know you."

    2. "I don't care what everybody else says about you — you seem OK to me."


    3. "I bet your mom doesn’t put your coloring pages on the fridge."

    A children's drawing of jungle creatures like lions, giraffes, tigers, elephants

    4. "I'm not saying you're the dumbest person in the world — you just better hope they don't die."

    5. "I can explain it to you, but I can't understand it for you."

    "This is one I like to use when some dolt isn't getting a simple concept..."


    6. "I don’t know what's wrong with you, but I’m sure it’s hard to pronounce."

    7. "I think your family tree is a wreath."

    A wreath made out of roses

    8. "I don't respect you enough to be insulted by you."


    9. "Everyone that loves you is wrong."

    10. "Fuck me yourself, you coward."


    11. "You look like a dropped pie."

    A berry pie splattered on a white background

    12. "Hope your day is as nice as you."

    13. "I didn’t expect anything from you, and you still disappointed me."

    14. "Some woman to Churchill: 'If I were your wife, I’d poison your tea.' Churchill: 'If you were my wife, I’d drink it.'"

    Winston Churchill in a full suit and bowtie, standing in a garden staring at the camera

    15. "Your asshole must be jealous of all the shit coming out your mouth right now."

    16. "If you were any more inbred you’d be a fucking sandwich."

    Extreme close-up view of a sandwich

    17. "Do you get jealous when your phone dies?'"

    A table with a phone just out of reach of an upturned, weak looking hand

    18. "You're not hot enough to be as dumb as you are."


    19. "You push a lot of doors that say 'pull,' don't you?"

    View of a man's hand on a door handle

    20. "You complete spatula."

    A few spatulas arranged haphazardly on a background

    21. "If they’re being a dick to you: 'I’ve heard worse from better people.'"


    Are there any colossal clapbacks that didn't make the list? Let us know in the comments!

    And check out the whole withering Reddit thread here.

    Note: Some answers have been edited for length and/or clarity.