Welcome to the new BuzzFeed Sex Q&A where you can ask us your awkward, confusing, gross, embarrassing, or thought-provoking questions, and we'll provide answers from leading sexual health experts. Have a question about sex or sexual health? Send it to sexQs@buzzfeed.com.
This week's question:
I'm just going to dive right in here. I recently started seeing someone new, after getting out of a lengthy relationship. This guy is perfect; he's everything I have been looking for in a relationship. A few nights ago, things started getting a little hot and heavy, and we ended up in his bedroom. The sexual tension between the two of us was huge. I had never wanted to jump someone's bones so bad. Things were moving pretty fast; actually so fast that we skipped most of the foreplay and he was on top of me before I knew it. I had been anticipating this moment for so long, until I saw what I was working with: an extremely small penis.
I haven't had many sexual partners, but I seem to have lucked out in the "man junk" department. This situation was totally new to me. I have never faked an orgasm like that in my life. Now, I am terrified to get in bed with him again. How do I handle his small member without ruining our sex life?
Hi, Frustrated Girlfriend! Thanks for sending your question. To help answer it, we spoke with sex expert Laura Berman, Ph.D., author of Loving Sex, and sex researcher Debby Herbenick, Ph.D., author of The Coregasm Workout. Here's what they had to say:
Despite all those myths and stereotypes, penis size is not the be-all and end-all of sexual satisfaction.
First, let's talk about how small the penis actually is.
Tip No. 1: Keep in mind that his erection may not be reaching its full potential just yet.
Tip No. 2: Reducing the lubrication can help you feel more sensations.
Tip No. 3: Squeezing your pelvic floor muscles can make penetration feel more awesome.
Tip No. 4: Try positions that allow more friction and clitoral stimulation.
One more thing! Communication and honesty are crucial — but don't put down his penis.
The bottom line: Penis size is one small part of the equation, and it's not mandatory for great sex.
Do you have a question you want answered by our sex experts? Email us at sexQs@buzzfeed.com.
ALSO, the more details you give, the better answers you'll get. Judgment-free zone! Feel free to sign it however you want (first name, alias, anonymous, some kind of descriptive sign-off, whatever), and we'll reach out if we end up answering your question. Check out some of the questions we've already answered: