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    19 Tweets You'll Get If You Are 100% Single In 2018

    "I like being single, but I’m over being single."

    1. This single-young-professional warrior cry:

    Who are we? SINGLE YOUNG PROFESSIONALS What do we want? FOR PERISHABLE GROCERIES TO BE SOLD IN SMALLER PORTION SIZES

    2. These helpful instructions for success in love:

    Life is short. If you have a crush on someone, walk right up to them then a little past them and just keep going it’s probably not worth it

    3. And this accurate depiction of first dates:

    me: goes on a date group chat: 👀👀👀👀👀👀 me:

    4. This expectation v. reality:

    opened a DM picture from a man expecting it to be a dick pic but it was a poem, which is somehow worse

    5. This very important list:

    5 reasons why YOU should date ME: 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. Please lol

    6. This fool-proof plan:

    *specifically tweets something targeted at my crush who might just so happen to see it and magically know i like them without me having to say i like them so they can say it and then boom we're together*

    7. This unfortunate truth:

    Apparently you have to talk to people and go outside in order to date... #WhyImSingle

    8. This girl who has her priorities straight:

    9. This joke…or maybe existential crisis:

    being single is all fun and games until you realise it’s a never ending cycle of getting to know someone, they eventually stop texting you, then they watch your Instagram story every day until you die

    10. This first-date misunderstanding:

    On a first date: Him: So, what do you like to do for fun? Me: ...ummm... I don’t know... drink. Him: (laughs) No, I meant like hobbies. I enjoy hiking and reading. Me: (long pause)... *sigh* I’m going to be alone forever.

    11. This life hack:

    I order my food in drive thru with my regular voice. Then pretend I have a passenger and use another voice so they don’t think I’m lonely and I eat a lot. #WhyImSingle https://t.co/FGoG2wR6wC

    12. This observation that rings a little too true:

    Dating in 2018: having relationship problems with someone you’re not in a relationship with.

    13. This circle-of-life moment:

    14. This single who is not looking to mingle:

    Friend: "Love is in the air" Me: *stops breathing* #SingleButNotSorry

    15. This reminder that modern romance is dead:

    Very flattered that you tried inviting me over at two am but, now hear me out. What if you asked me on a date instead.

    16. This "dinner and a movie" moment:

    date: i love your shoes! me: ugh, these old things? they were free date: take the compliment! me: no like a kid stole them, threw them over a guard rail & they hit me on the head date: what?? me: ya turns out they used to belong to some basketball star date: this is ‘holes’

    17. This accurate exchange:

    #whyimsingle me: hmm it would be nice to have a boyfriend *man speaks to me* me:

    18. This honestly perfect-sounding first date:

    What is wrong with me? I’m on a first date and I asked if he just wanted hang and play trivia.

    19. And, finally, this. Just, this:

    i like being single but i’m over being single

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