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Build Your Dream Vacation Home And We'll Reveal Your Secret Celebrity Boyfriend

Your secret boyfriend is Adam Driver. He’s strapping and rustic and a little bit creepy, but you like that, don’t you? He always smells a little bit like he's just been sheering sheep and doing pushups in the rain, but in a nice way. Due to your artistic proclivities you can appreciate his erratic moods and impulsive need for solitude. Eventually one of you will be killed by a wild animal, so let's hope it's him.

Adam Driver is your secret boyfriend

Your secret boyfriend is Jason Mamoa. You first met at a NoDAPL fundraiser and then things very quickly went off the rails at a steampunk themed dive bar in Silverlake. For a while you met a few times a month in an abandoned Pepsi warehouse in the outskirts of Pasadena. Your rendezvous have upgraded to gorgeous tropical beaches but the sentiment is the same, y'all grimy. He is teaching you how to surf. You're teaching him how to use an iPad. You call him “batgirl”, he calls you “Toni Braxton”.

Jason Mamoa is your secret boyfriend

Don’t tell anyone, but Gael Garcia Bernal is your secret boyfriend. Your designated meeting place is at your rustic, yet curated, eclectic cabin in Sierra Madre de Oaxaca in southern Mexico. A bouquet of wild flowers greets you at your hand-hewn door - he’s beaten you there, again. You step into the cabin and, as your eyes adjust to the light, your clandestine lover arises from the shadows, the scent of Occidental pine-oak, an indigenous plant to the region picked up from the half-day hike in the mountainous Southern Mexico region, wafts from his white v-neck. Without breaking eye contact, he flicks on the record player, literally any Devandra Banhart song hums through the gramophone. Then you, like, totally do it.

Gael Garcia Bernal is your secret boyfriend

You’ve got a boner for the most basics of douchebags and so here is a picture of that annoying _Gilmore Girls_ dude. Yeah he’s handsome and rich but he very much sucks. Maybe that’s what you deserve? Maybe you’re a current fuckboy yourself? Maybe, for a plethora of very valid reasons, you got caught up in the fast and furious world of consumerist validation. We want better for you. We know you are better than this. Dream big and don't be afraid to feel your deepest feelings.

Some Rando Lamewad is your secret boyfriend

Your secret boyfriend is Mahershala Ali. You met at one of those pop-up restaurants where the whole time you’re like, how does this even break even? The chemistry was electric. Then, weirdly, you bumped into him at a train station in Nice. Next thing you know you’re on a chartered yacht to Polignano a Mare. You fall madly in love, however he remains preoccupied with his pottery.

Mahershala Ali is your secret boyfriend

Your secret boyfriend is Timothée Chalamet. Foreplay is you modern dancing to Erik Satie in your open concept Parisian penthouse. Your partnership is elegant and avant garde. For you, he opens up an accessibility to a beauty, drama, and refinement you didn't think was available in daily life. To him you are kindling; delicate, effective, and so very real.

Timothée Chalamet is your secret boyfriend

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Créez la maison de vos rêves et on vous révèle quel homme célèbre sera votre petit ami secret

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Build Your Dream Vacation Home And We'll Reveal Your Secret Celebrity Boyfriend

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Build Your Dream Vacation Home And We'll Reveal Your Secret Celebrity Boyfriend

Did you know you can sign up for a BuzzFeed Community account and create your own BuzzFeed posts? Here's a handy guide to help you start posting today!

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