The Ranking Of Winter Olympic Mascots From Cute To Creepy

In celebration of Sochi’s, no, the world’s, creepiest bear

1. Quatchi, Sumi, Mukmuk, Miga - 2010

What a little heart warming quartet. These little woodland creatures looked adorable both in CGI form and as furry little mascots parading through the snow-covered streets of Vancouver. Would I put the little round one in my pocket? Absolutely.

3. What The Sochi Mascots Were Supposed To Look Like - 2014

Nothing can go wrong here, right? Look at how fuzzy the bunny is, and look at the polar bear’s round little paws. Don’t forget that leopard’s cool look about him. These little animals are perfect. There’s no way someone would turn them into 10 story monsters for their big Primetime debut!

4. Powder, Copper, and Coal - 2002

These guys look like Sega and Anime made a hyper little group of babies. They’re fun, energetic, and really not that creepy! I’d ski with them any day. The also successfully create a genuine smile, rather than a weird, “I’m gonna kill you” grin. Yes, their names might not be their strong-suit, but they’re so happy.

6. Roni - 1980

Basically, Roni might not be the cutest little raccoon, but he’s the ultimate badass. He can successfully pass every event with flying colors. Look at that form! However, we’re starting to get into the creepy territory, because he has only ONE expression…

7. PEOPLE Håkon and Kristin - 1994

Okay, little kids in mittens and colorful wool garments. Cute, but kind of weird. These blonde haired, blue eyed siblings were the mascot of the Lillehammer olympics. Kinda freaks me out.

8. Vučko - 1984

This little wolf was a perfect fit for the 80’s, but do you see that conniving look he has in his eyes, especially for 1984? “Big Brother is Watching You,” anyone?

9. Neve and Gliz - 2006

Ahhhh Neve and Gliz. They really had something going for them from the neck up. They were so promising, until a snowman mated with Gumby.

10. Hidy and Howdy - 1988

Awwww, what could be cuter than two snuggly little cowboy bears?

WRONG. The two cubs are something nightmares are made out of.

12. Schuss AKA Lightning Sperm - 1968


Do I really need to explain?

13. Magique, the “Man-star/snow imp” - 1992

I’m just not sure why you would choose a “snow imp” starfish elf as your mascot. He just really creeps me out and I’m not entirely positive I could give him a hug back. I’m scared he might poke my eye out.

14. Schneemann - 1976

All I’m saying is, this is the LAST thing I would want to see skiing behind me. They look like the round version of Spy v. Spy. *shudder*

16. The Snowlets - 1998

Oh no, the Snowlets, not the Snowlets. Hearing “Snowlet,” one would think awwww a little snowy owl…WRONG! You couldn’t be more wrong. These look like the owls of a serial killer. Their noses, beady eyes, and strange colors all point to signs, their ready to peck my eyes out and feed me to their young.

17. Yoggl - 2012 Winter Youth

Yoggl. I wouldn’t wanna get caught in a staring contest with this guy. Those eyes. Does he not remind anyone else of that creepy horse from Family Guy?

19. What The Sochi Bear Ended Up Looking Like - 2014

Oh man, and I thought the bears from the Miley Cyrus videos creeped my out. The mascots all had such promise. Why animatronics? Why?

Andy why is his face so squished? It’s so small in comparison to his head.

21. If You’d Like To Reach Me, I’ll Be Hiding Under My Bed

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