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Posted on Dec 18, 2014

We Need To Talk About How Creepy Elf On The Shelf Is

He sees you when you're sleeping, he knows when you're awake.

Listen up gang, there is an epidemic happening that we all need to talk about. The ~sweet and meaningful~ Elf on the Shelf is infiltrating homes across the WORLD.

Some might say he's spreading joy and cheer to children and families everywhere.

But have you ever noticed this "innocent" little sprite always seems to be watching you?

You may put him on a designated shelf, but his eyes always catch yours no matter where you go.

THIS ISN'T A COINCIDENCE PEOPLE. He's inescapable once he gets into your home.

Want to snuggle up to a good holiday movie? LOL THAT'S A JOKE, because he'll show up in your popcorn.

How about a romantic kiss under the mistletoe? Look who just conveniently shows up.

He knows where you are and he knows where you're going.

Want to go to a holiday party at a friends house to escape the terror? Turns out he hitched a ride with you.

You can't even get bathroom privacy without him watching.

Don't even try to leave because he's already sealed all the doors and windows.

He's even got your pets under his mind control.

And he's watched you at the doctor's office, to see if you conveniently happen to be allergic to anything.

It's not Santa Claus coming to town you should be worried about, it's the Elf of the Shelf...

You better watch out, you better not cry.

You better not pout, I'm telling you why.

He's making a list and checking it twice.

Gonna find out who's naughty and nice.

He sees you when you're sleeping.

He knows when you're awake.

He knows if you've been bad or good.

So be good...

... for goodness...

... SAKE.

It's time to see the true reason behind his cheeky grin.

THIS IS A WARNING TO EVERYONE OUT THERE:

Sony Pictures Classics

WE NEED TO DEAL WITH THE ELF ON THE SHELF ONCE AND FOR ALL.

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