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Let's Play Aprils Fools Or Not: Colorado State Legislature Edition

Here's a fun little game in honor of April Fools Day. Try to guess which statements from Colorado state legislators are real and which ones are made up for April Fools Day.

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  1. State Rep. Gordon Klingenschmitt Once Asked for a Moment of Silence at the State Legislature for Fetuses

    The Advocate / Via advocate.com

    Did Gordon Klingenschmitt actually use the anniversary of Roe v Wade to call on the Colorado state legislature to hold a moment of silence for fetuses? April Fools or Not?

    Correct
    Incorrect
    Not April Fools
    Not April Fools

    Uh, I could totally see Gordon Klingenschmitt saying that.

    Correct
    Incorrect
    April Fools
    April Fools

    No way, that's just crazy.

    Correct!
    Wrong!

    Not April Fools

    State Representative Gordon Klingenschmitt once used the anniversary of Roe v Wade to call for a “moment of silence to remember the 57 million American citizens that have been lost since the Roe v. Wade decision.”

    Not April Fools
  1. Did Republican Senator Once Thank a Committee He Was Presenting to for Being All-Male

    Colorado Senate News / Via coloradosenatenews.com

    Did Republican and super conservative state senator Tim Neville once say to the State Affairs Committee, "Thank you sir, and as the only other committee that is all male, other than Finance I believe probably in the legislature, it was my pleasure to be here."

    Correct
    Incorrect
    April Fools
    April Fools

    It's 2015, surely this never happened.

    Correct
    Incorrect
    Not April Fools
    Not April Fools

    Why yes, yes he did.

    Correct!
    Wrong!

    Not April Fools

    Sure enough, Senator Tim Nevile did indeed say this.

    Not April Fools
  1. Did a Colorado State Senator Once Waiver In Voting to Ban Microbeads Because He Wanted the Ladies to Stay Pretty?

    flickr / Via Flickr: coloradosenategop

    Did Colorado State Senator Larry Crowder really wrestle with a bill that would have banned waterway destroying microbeads because he wanted the "ladies to stay pretty."

    Correct
    Incorrect
    Not April Fools
    Not April Fools

    We watched Mad Men, this totally could have happened.

    Correct
    Incorrect
    April Fools
    April Fools

    No way. I mean, Mad Men was set in the 1960s, that's like 50 years ago.

    Correct!
    Wrong!

    Not April Fools

    This totally happened. In the debate of a bill banning the use of tiny plastic “microbeads” in personal care products that are accumulating in waterways, Senator Crowder said this: "Thank you Mister Chair, I wrestled with this bill harder than any bill I’ve had to date. The very idea of our facial cream, if the ladies had to give that, that, the beads up, would that affect the beauty of the ladies in which we deal with on a daily basis? I say, my fellow Americans, I was assured that it does, it would not, so therefore I will be a yes vote on this. I do believe the industry came forward in droves and indicated that they would like to quit making this, but the beauty of the ladies in which we deal with is a real factor to me, and I struggled with this, but I am gonna be a yes vote. And I hope this is the right vote, because I want the ladies to stay pretty. Thank you."

    Not April Fools
  1. Did a Colorado State Senator Actually Claim Kids Were Being Rounded Up in Schools and Vaccinated?

    youtube / Via youtube.com

    Did Colorado State Senator Laura Woods really claim on the senate floor that Colorado kids were being rounded up and vaccinated?

    Correct
    Incorrect
    April Fools
    April Fools

    Uh, anti-vaxxers aren't that detached from reality.

    Correct
    Incorrect
    Not April Fools
    Not April Fools

    Uh, anti-vaxxers are pretty detached from reality.

    Correct!
    Wrong!

    Not April Fools

    Why yes, yes she did. Senator Laura Woods did stand up on the Senate floor and claim that Colorado kids are being rounded up and vaccinated in the debate over a bill with the Orwellian title of "Parents Bill of Rights".

  1. Did a State Representative Introduce an Amendment to a Minimum Wage Bill to Raise the Wage to $1,000 an Hour?

    aurora sentinel / Via aurorasentinel.com

    Did State Rep. Kevin Priola really introduce an amendment to raise the minimum wage to $1,000 a hour to a bill which would have raise the minimum wage in Colorado? Even tossing in the statement, "It would let the poor eat lobster instead of ramen."

    Correct
    Incorrect
    Not April Fools
    Not April Fools

    Uh, please tell me this is an April Fools joke.

    Correct
    Incorrect
    April Fools
    April Fools

    Please tell me this is an April Fools joke. Pretty please.

    Correct!
    Wrong!

    Not April Fools

    When the Colorado state house of representatives debated a bill to raise Colorado's minimum wage to a living wage, Rep. Kevin Priola did indeed introduce an amendment to raise the wage to $1,000 an hour. And yes, he really did say, "It would let the poor eat lobster instead of ramen." And yes, this is horrendous.

    Not April Fools
  1. Did a Colorado Republican Lawmaker Really Say that IUDs Stop a Small Child from Implanting?

    Did Kevin Lundberg, a Republican representative, really say he opposed funding for a wildly successful program that has reduced teen pregnancy in Colorado by 40% because he believes the IUD birth control method to be an “abortifacient” that would stop “a small child from implanting.”

    Correct
    Incorrect
    April Fools
    April Fools

    This is just too stupid to be true.

    Correct
    Incorrect
    Not April Fools
    Not April Fools

    Dear lord, that is stupid. But it is Kevin Lundberg, so anything is possible.

    Correct!
    Wrong!

    Not April Fools

    Representative Kevin Lundberg really did say that IUDs stop small children from implanting while voting to deny funding to a hugely successful ant-poverty, anti-teen pregnancy bill.

    Not April Fools
  1. Did a Colorado Elected Official Really Claim the Horrible Attack on a Pregnant Woman was God's Wrath for Abortion?

    Did State Rep Gordon Klingenschmitt (yes, him again) really blame the horrible attack on a pregnant Colorado woman by a deranged woman that left the pregnant woman in critical condition and the fetus dead, as God’s curse upon America for the sin of legal abortion?

    Correct
    Incorrect
    April Fools
    April Fools

    Uh, well, it is Dr. Chaps, but even he wouldn't take his crazy this far, right?

    Correct
    Incorrect
    Not April Fools
    Not April Fools

    Uh, well, it is Dr. Chaps and he is nuts.

    Correct!
    Wrong!

    Not April Fools

    Yes, Representative Gordon Klingenschmitt, aka Dr. Chaps, really did blame this terrible, horrible, awful crime on God. He then tried to donate $1,000 to the woman's fundraiser to help cover her medical bills. The family wisely returned the money with a thanks, but no thanks.

    Not April Fools

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