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12 Ways To Numb The Inexhaustible Pain Of Consciousness

As told by Colin Farrell's Season 2 bender.

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4. Hey, another couple runs on the old ski slopes couldn't hurt.

HBO

In a couple minutes, it won't matter what the results of the paternity test your ex-wife is making you take are!

6. Pop a couple more lines of the good stuff up the old honker for good measure.

HBO

It's not like you brutally assaulted the father of the 12-year-old who bullied your son and told him, "You ever bully or hurt anybody again, I’ll come back and buttfuck your father with your mom’s headless corpse on this goddamn lawn!"

9. Take the edge off with a nice cold beer and another fat line of the white lady.

HBO

Sometimes you just need to relax after a long day of colluding with the corrupt Vinci Police Department and being blackmailed into crime by mob boss Frank Semyon!

11. Rip the shirt open to see how the old ticker is handling this epic one-man party.

HBO

You wouldn't want to have any health problems after you've already been shot at point blank range by a person in a bird mask!

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