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22 Secrets Air Hostesses Will Never Tell You

What happens on layovers stays on layovers.

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1. No matter how tired you may be on a long haul flight, we're definitely sleepier.

We’ve been up longer, done more running around, and we stand up for 7-plus hours. You can’t beat us in the exhaustion stakes.

5. You’ll be hard pressed to find an air hostess who is in the Mile High Club.

Once you’ve cleaned aircraft loos enough, you know better than to expose your parts to those surfaces. Not sexy.

6. What happens on layovers stays on layovers.

This is the most incestuous business around - the very premise of those short stays on distant shores sets us all up in literally ideal no-strings circumstances.

7. At home, we are total flakes.

Our sets of 24 hours aren’t the same as grounds-people’s, and we are always knackered, so don’t try to make plans with us. We will forget we were meant to see you, or more likely, fall asleep.

9. Our handbags are the most terrifyingly organised yet random things you will ever see.

Passport, check. Sunglasses, check. Hair gel, ENDLESS spare stockings, clear nail polish for ladder prevention, blister plasters, toothbrush, mini iron - check check check check check.

10. If you see us standing in a random spot in the cabin during lights out, we’re not really keeping an eye on you.

It’s probably just the warmest place we could find, and we’re actually watching your in-flight movie over your shoulder to stay awake.

Note: This post was written under a pseudonym.

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