The ABCs According To The Kardashians

C is for Cry Face.

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A is for Ass.

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Ass (noun): the foundation of the Kardashian empire.

B is for Bible.

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Bible (verb): to be used in place of "I swear," to prove you're not being so rude right now and a liar.

C is for Cry Face.

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Cry Face (noun): the face one makes while emotional.

D is for Down-Ass Bitch.

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Down-Ass Bitch (noun): a woman who's down for anything.

E is for Emoji.

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Emoji (noun): the modern-day equivalent to words. 💁📱

F is for Fresh Makeup.

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Fresh Makeup (noun): new face paint you don't want to ruin with tears.

G is for Gorgina.

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Gorgina (noun): term of endearment; portmanteau of "gorgeous" and "vagina."

H is for Ho.

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Ho (noun): historically a derogatory term, but can be embraced as a fun way to live your life after a traumatic breakup.

I is for Instagram.

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Instagram (noun): the ideal social media site to share selfies.

J is for Jam.

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Jam (noun): the title of Kim's one and only musical endeavor.

K is for Kan-ye.

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Kan-ye (noun): the very specific way the Kardashian family pronounces rapper Kanye West's name.

L is for Literally.

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Literally (adverb): a way of emphasizing or exaggerating your point; often used in place of the correct "figuratively."

M is for Momager.

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Momager (noun): a mother who takes 10% of whatever her children earn.

N is for Night Vision Camera.

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Night Vision Camera (noun): the preferred filming equipment of Rick Salomon, not Ray J.

O is for Oh My God.

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Oh My God (exclamation): phrase to invoke when you can't believe what Kim and/or another member of the family has done.

P is for Party Panties.

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Party Panties (noun): the underwear you wear for a night out on the town. Or, if you're Kris Jenner, the underwear you do not wear for a night out on the town.

Q is for Queen.

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Queen (noun): see, "Kourtney Kardashian."

R is for Ride or Die.

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Ride or Die (adjective): describes a group whose members are committed to one another 110%, through the good and the bad.

S is for Selfie.

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Selfie (noun): a photo of oneself, to be posted to social media at least once a day.

T is for Ten Percent.

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Ten Percent (noun): the portion of her children's money a momager is entitled to.

U is for Ugh.

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Ugh (exclamation): a sound made in moments of disgust, such as walking in on your mother doing a seminude photo shoot.

V is for Vogue.

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Vogue (noun): preeminent American fashion magazine, the April 2014 issue of which Khloé Kardashian read on the toilet.

W is for Whatever.

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Whatever (exclamation): word to invoke when you couldn't care less about what someone, like the father of your children, decides to do.

X is for Xanax.

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Xanax (noun): an anxiety medication Khloé Kardashian believes Kris Jenner needs.

Y is for Yawn.

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Yawn (verb): Kim Kardashian's favorite involuntary bodily function.

Z is for Zipline.

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Zipline (noun): an outdoor activity involving sliding across a rope, which Kim Kardashian finds terrifying.

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