Recently, we asked the BuzzFeed Community to tell us the reasons why they (or someone they know) called off their wedding. And they shared some stories. Below are some of their reasons, and yes, more than a few involve cheating:
1. Sleeping with the BFF:
2. A break of trust:
"His mom embezzled $300k from our church. My fiancé hadn’t known, but when he did find out (after his mom was fired), he didn’t tell me. I had to find out from our pastor, the week before the congregation got a letter about the whole mess. I decided he’d have that week to tell me, but he never did. In the end, it wasn’t his mom’s actions that ended the relationship, it was the fact that he couldn’t tell me about it. I knew I wouldn’t be able to trust him to be honest with me."
3. The not-so-nice family:
"We were very happy together and have been friends since kindergarten. His family hated me and made no attempt to hide it. Some people do fine in that situation. I, however, am not one to be treated like a kicked puppy. I told him how bad it was repeatedly, but he wouldn’t do anything about it. He just said that we were fine and the way he felt was what mattered. I ultimately decided that I couldn’t marry someone who wouldn’t take up for me."
4. Choosing a home over a wedding:
5. Too controlling:
"There were so many red flags with my former fiancé, but the final straw was when I lost my insurance and he forbid me from going to Planned Parenthood for birth control."
6. The emotional affair (that might have been more):
"My ex fiancé had an emotional affair with a 'friend.' She told him about her sexual preferences and he was slapping her ass right in front of me, more than once. They thought it was okay to go on a vacation together, alone for a week and she was manipulating him, which he thought was funny.
I never thought I was going to have to police my partner's friendships, but there I was. He ended the engagement because I had 'changed,' while I am still unsure if those two were having a sexual relationship three years later. I never want to do that again."
7. Realizing it was all a mistake:
8. Tried to make it work, but learned it wasn't worth it:
"He started cheating on me the day after he proposed, and I found out six months later — when the girl gained a conscience (she knew he was engaged). I tried to make it work. We went to therapy to try and save our relationship, but after eight months of no improvement and him putting anyone and anything before me, I grew a backbone and left while he was away on a boys weekend (that he didn’t tell me about until his plane landed).
We would’ve had to start paying the venue a month later, so at least I saved money there. However, I have a $1,200 dress credit that I’ll probably never use."
9. He wanted to still be able to have sex with another woman:
"Ex told me that if I survived six months after my double organ transplant that we could get married. When I made it to a year, we talked about venues with his parents, catering, my sister bought a dress, etc. Six months after my transplant, I found out that he was cheating on me with someone from his gaming group. He said he might still marry me — but I had to let him have sex with his other woman, and I was to keep feeding him and washing his clothes.
I was such a doormat that I let it go on for six months before kicking him out. I flattened his engagement ring (a cheap silver thing he won at a fair years before he met me) with a hammer."
10. The mirror reveal:
11. COVID-19:
"Freaking COVID. 🥺 Still haven’t gotten our money back from the venue. $10,000 in debt for a wedding that didn’t happen is a great way to start a new marriage. Yes, I’m still salty."
12. Revealed who he truly was:
"After having major surgery on my eye that of course bruised, my then-fiancé told me he couldn’t stand to look at me. Then he started avoiding my calls, so I told him that if he can’t stand by me after one surgery, then he needed to leave. He didn’t even try to fight for us."
13. The breakup while watching TV:
"My fiancé told me he didn’t love me anymore. On a Tuesday. Watching TV. It was four months before our wedding and the most expensive and humiliating time of my life. But I learned the big lessons: never settle, always have hope, and believe in love."
14. The text message Christmas breakup:
15. The man who didn't regret cheating:
"Not me, but my mom before she married my dad was engaged to her boyfriend of seven years. Two weeks before the wedding, the guy cheated on her while drunk, and when she found out, she was upset, but she did forgive him. However, the night before the wedding, he told her that he didn't regret cheating on her because he had just been trying to live his life before he was bound to marriage. She broke it off right then and there."
16. The last-minute emergency:
"I canceled my wedding because our then-18-month-old had his first asthma attack. I was in an ambulance when I should have been walking down the aisle.
He was fine, thankfully, and my husband and I got married the next day. Our amazing venue rearranged it all for us. Phenomenal. We were exhausted, though, and I nodded off during the speeches — oops!!!"
17. The realization:
"I canceled my first wedding when I was around 22. I had been with him since I was 15 and thought the next step was marriage. I realized I couldn’t marry him because I couldn’t see myself waking up next to him every day. We had spent a majority of our relationship as a long-distance relationship."
18. And lastly, the meddling mom with A PLAN:
Submissions have been edited for length and/or clarity.