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    16 Halloween Costumes No Man Should Ever Wear

    These costumes aren't as clever as you might think.

    1. Skeleboner

    Via spirithalloween.com

    What this costume really says: I am compensating for having a small dick.

    2. Baseball Nut

    Via spirithalloween.com

    What this costume really says: Ladies, please steer clear.

    3. Genie in the Lamp

    Via costumesupercenter.com

    What this costume really says: I am too lazy to think of a better sleazy costume.

    4. Down for the Count Costume

    Via costumesupercenter.com

    What this costume really says: The only thing I'll be going home with is this inflatable doll.

    5. Pussy (Cat) Magnet

    Via wallary.com

    What this costume really says: I've never seen a woman naked in real life.

    6. Dr. Howie Feltersnatch, Gynecologist

    Via spirithalloween.com

    What this costume really says: This should really read "Dr. Ivan Nevafelteasnatch."

    7. Giant Boob

    Via spirithalloween.com

    What this costume really says: I don't realize that I really am just a giant boob in life.

    8. Firefighter with Big Hose

    Via spirithalloween.com

    What this costume really says: I don't have the body to pull off a "sexy" fireman.

    9. Snake Charmer

    Via spirithalloween.com

    What this costume really says: I don't understand what being culturally offensive is.

    10. Camille Tow Aerobics Instructor

    Via spirithalloween.com

    What this costume really says: I have the most disgusting Google search history. Like, it's sick, sick.

    11. Country Lovin

    Via costumediscounters.com

    What this costume really says: I am that guy who makes all sorts of awkward sexual jokes -- all the time!

    12. Nice Beaver

    Via costumesupercenter.com

    What this costume really says: "No, I am not a squirrel, I am a beaver! Don't you get it?"

    13. Happy Priest

    Via spirithalloween.com

    What this costume really says: I find pedophilia funny.

    14.

    Via costumesupercenter.com

    What this costume really says: I actually have no idea how to clam dive, at all.

    15. Poo Poo Platter

    Via reputation.com

    What this costume really says: I am a literal shithead of a person.

    16. Shocker

    Via spirithalloween.com

    What this costume really says: I am a HUGE Dane Cook fan.

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