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14 Signs You've Been Single Way Too Long

Shh, it's OK. Commiserate with the cast of The Singles Project, premiering August 12, Tuesday @10/9c on BRAVO.

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1. You lost half a Vietnamese sandwich somewhere in your covers last night.


(Don't worry, it's with the others.)

2. Your friends don't even pretend to ask you for relationship advice anymore.


Yeah, whatever.

3. You have no idea how to flirt...


Did I wink? Was that a wink? Did I do it now?

4. ...but you go on a date every few months, so when your mom calls, you can tell her you're "dating."

jetnazareno / CC / Via

"Cool, Mom. Bye."

5. You know what it's like not to feel the warmth of a human smile for days.

Alix McAlpine / BuzzFeed

6. You will poke both of your eyes out if someone asks if you're putting yourself out there...

Will Herring / BuzzFeed

7. ...or if you hear "it'll happen when you least expect it."

Adult Swim /

"You shut your mouth when you're talking to me."

8. You can't believe your non-single friends think it's OK to ever complain about the last time they had sex.


Oh, really, fool?

9. You wish that every time someone weird offers to buy you a drink, you could sub it for an order of mozzarella sticks.

Bravo / Shahs Of Sunset

There should be some sort of mozz sticks or vodka soda hand signal.

10. You've finally figured out how boring it is to go out with your non-single friends.


You're always the last one to buy one more drink, and then they just patiently sit there and watch you finish it.

11. You know in your heart of hearts that there is no such thing as one glass of wine.

12. You gave up on serious online dating long ago.

Courtesy of Anne Louise Korallus-Shapiro
Courtesy of Anne Louise Korallus-Shapiro

(It's for jokes/someone suddenly falling in love with you because of your emoji choices.)

13. You laugh when you get two sets of eating utensils in your delivery.

Tyler Naugle / BuzzFeed

And then you cry into your Massaman curry.

14. But some day, this type of closeness could be yours:

Watch others try and get un-single in The Singles Project, premiering August 12, Tuesday @10/9c on BRAVO.