It's time to play...
Only eat Vegemite for the rest of your life?Only drink Milo for the rest of your life?
Only drink Milo for the rest of your life!
Think about it - Milo isn't that bad. Sure you might get tired of it, but if you only eat Vegemite for your whole life you'll have more salt in your body than in the ocean. And then you'll die. Idiot.
Have a mansion in Bondi but never be able to sit down?Have a small house in Darwin but never be able to stand up?
Have a mansion in Bondi but never be able to sit down!
Mansions are awesome! Bondi is awesome! I'm sure you could figure something out about the whole "never being able to sit down thing." It's not that bad, and no one wants to live in Darwin.
Have a pouch like a kangaroo (complete with baby joey) forever?Have chlamydia like koalas forever?
Have a pouch like a kangaroo (complete with baby joey) forever!
At least with the pouch you'd have a cool place to keep stuff. An no one wants chlamydia, seriously. Chlamydia is never "the best option."
Get a phone thrown at you every day by Russell Crowe?Have everyone in the world think you're a racist, no matter what you say?
Get a phone thrown at you every day by Russell Crowe!
No one ever wants to be thought of as a racist, and you can always dodge the phone.
Have boomerangs for hands?Have perpetually sandy feet?
Have boomerangs for hands!
Sure, it might be hard to pick things up at first but I'm sure you'd figure it out. Having perpetually sandy feet, on the other hand, would be just plain terrible. What kind of a job interview would you nail when you're tracking sand behind you?
Be forever sunburnt?Be forever covered in aloe vera gel?
Be forever sunburnt!
Be SUNBURNT and THEN put on aloe vera gel to deal with the problem, idiot! If you're forever covered in aloe vera gel you're gonna resemble some sort of swamp monster. And no one likes swamp monsters - ask Scooby Doo.
Have Southern Cross tattoos all over your entire body?Only drink Goon for the rest of your life?
Only drink Goon for the rest of your life!
Everyone loves a party starter! And hey, I never said HOW OFTEN you had to drink the goon. Pace yourself. On the flip side, who's gonna want to be your friend when you have eight southern cross tattoos on your face? No one. That's who.
Poop out 100 five cent coins?Pee out ONE ten cent coin?
Poop out 100 five cent coins!
Look, both these options suck. But the pee-hole is made for one thing and one thing only - pee. It's not a very flexible hole. The poop-hole, on the other hand...
Have a government leader represent you on the global scale who also denies climate change?Have a government leader represent you who accepts bribes and is untrustworthy?
Have a government leader represent you who accepts bribes and is untrustworthy!
You could bribe them, ya dummy!
Only be able to shower with beach water? (no filters)Have sea coral for hair?
Have sea coral for hair!
It actually has quite a good shape to it.