10 Things You Can Buy Instead Of A Private Forum With Joe Hockey

Australian treasurer Joe Hockey is offering private access to business and industry representatives in return for upwards of tens of thousand of dollars.

1. 44000 McDonald’s Soft Serve Cones.

McDonald’s / Via mcdonalds.com.au

Share it with friends, hand them out on the street, or EAT THEM ALL YOURSELF.

2. Pay your friend $22,000 to wear a Nickelback shirt all day, every day, for a year.

This would be incredible. Up to you if they can change their Nickelback shirt.

3. Decorate your whole home with Nicholas Cage pillow cases ($15 each)

Use the cash to buy 1466 of these bad boys. If you run out of pillows just put it on your walls as a nice piece of art.

4. A lifetime supply of Vegemite ($7)

You could buy 3142 jars of Vegemite and bathe in it (if you wanted.)

5. 2 x Giant Penis Sculptures.

Put’em all round your home - or even in the office - for as little as $11,000 each!


1,500 ladybugs for just over $10. That’s 3300000 ladybugs. Don’t tell me you wouldn’t want this. You’re wrong.

7. Travel the world.

Flickr: 63349090@N08 / Creative Commons

Flickr: 50144889@N08 / Creative Commons

David Ramos / Getty Images


$20,000 goes a long way.

8. 118 x Infant Circumcision Trainers ($185)

Are you bored? Have you mastered your profession? Are you out of hobbies? Try the Infant Circumcision Trainer and get one for all your mates!

9. 50 $400 photos with Avril Levigne.

But remember, you can’t touch her.

10. And 111 Tours of the Great Barrier Reef (around $180 each)

Get in quick before it disappears!

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Brad Esposito is a news reporter for BuzzFeed and is based in Sydney, Australia.
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