12 Reasons Why I Wish Gary Busey Was My Dad.

When I’m reincarnated it will be as his offspring.

1. He has a killer smile.

Those pearly whites (or yellows) would be passed on to me and I would be able to live my life without feeling so…empty.

2. His face is almost symmetrical. FROM EVERY ANGLE.

And they say that’s one of the most attractive features a man can have.

3. He’s smart and knows about a lot of things. INCLUDING anatomy.

I’d never let “The Man” tie you up Gary. Never.

4. He’s well travelled.

Gary seems to have been everywhere. And laughed the whole time he’s done it.

5. He’s a deep thinker.

And that would make…Enemies…friends back to front!


Changing for the sake of changing will just change the way you change. And that’s why I like changing. Because change can change like nothing because without change how do you change? Right Gary?

7. It would be easy to talk to him about awkward things.

I can’t wait for “the talk” when Gary teaches me about “breaking my virginity.”

8. He’s concerned about the environment and loves recycling.

Didn’t some rock stars used to do that? Man you’re cool Mr. Busey.

9. He’s energetic and charismatic.

Surgeons and doctors aren’t allowed to lie to patients. That’s a law.

10. He’s a legend.

And he’s constantly trying to educate others. For their own betterment.

11. And he knows his ABC’s.

There’s so, so many Gary. So, so many.

12. But most importantly…

HE’S ONE OF A KIND Thank you Gary Busey. Please adopt me.


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