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    Why Are My Kids In This 10 Week Anti-Smoking Class?

    I don't smoke. My daughter doesn't smoke. She's eight years old.

    Look, I get it.

    This is happening during the after school program and it's hard to arrange activities every day. I'm sure it's state funded and I'm sure it's nice to get a break from watching the kids for an hour or two. But my daughter hates it and now I have to pick her up early every Thursday until it's over.

    Obviously, don't smoke.

    For the record, I think it's fine to tell kids not to smoke, but what are they doing with the other nine weeks? You can only color lungs with black crayons for twenty minutes. You can only have so many quizzes where the correct answer is "smoking is bad".

    I'm totally innocent here.

    Thankfully, I don't smoke. Because if I picked up my kids and then learned that they'd secretly earned a doctorate in harassing me about my own smoking, I would be annoyed. It might save my life, but I would still find it irritating.

    Amuse my kids, please.

    As it is, my kids are shocked that smoke shops exist, and that anybody smokes anymore. Me too, but I didn't have to take a class about it. If you're going to drill anti-smoking messaging into their heads, can you at least create a cool mascot and an embarrassing rap song to go with it?