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Seattle Vs. Denver: Which City Is Better?

Rating the Super Bowl competitors' hometowns against each other in nine critical categories.

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3. Alliterative comedy: SLEEPLESS IN SEATTLE vs. DUMB AND DUMBER (set close by, in Aspen)

WINNER: DUMB AND DUMBER because it is funnier. (Denver)

7. Musicians: JIMI HENDRIX, NIRVANA, AND SIR MIX-A-LOT vs. VERY FEW ARTISTS THE AVERAGE PERSON HAS HEARD OF

WINNER: JIMI HENDRIX et al. because they are more accomplished than The Fray (right). (Seattle)

VERDICT

Jed Jacobsohn / Getty

It's a 4-4 tie, and the only tiebreaker is THE SUPER BOWL — which means that, for once, there's a lot riding on this game, as it will determine which of these cities we should keep and which we should burn to the ground.

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