1. They shoplift
2. They steal from small children
3. They rob cats
4. They ruin picnics
5. They steal consumer electronics
6. They steal donuts right out of someone’s mouth
7. They steal right out of penguins’ mouths
8. They steal from you when they think you’re not looking
9. They steal and don’t even clean up the mess they make
10. They steal cookies
11. They try to steal your angry birds plushies and end up dropping them on the ground
12. They spill food everywhere
13. They steal from cool dogs
14. They steal Doritos
15. They have no idea how to eat ice cream
16. They steal hamburgers
17. They steal fish all the time and just think it’s no big deal
18. They steal Cheetos
19. You give them a ride in your pickup truck and all they do is steal your cutlery
20. They steal steaks. Like a seagull even knows how to cook a damn steak.
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