23 People Who Will Kick Kim Jong-Un’s Ass If He Fires A Missile

He thinks he’s UN-stoppable, huh?

So, Kim Jong-un has announced that he will be firing a missile today.

Leading the civilized world to ask:

Here is a list of potential people who will kick his ass if he does.

23. Chuck Norris.

Frazer Harrison / Getty Images

Kind of like this:

22. Stalone.

Thomas Peter / Reuters

21. Uncle Joe.

Tony Gentile, Pool / AP


Pew, pew, pew.

20. Arnold Schwarzenegger’s state of California could be targeted by Kim Jong-Un.

Francois Mori / AP

It is not pretty when Schwarzenegger is on an ass-kicking spree.

19. The Chinese will join in the ass beating for destabilizing the region.

Tyrone Siu / Reuters

18. Clearly all the women in South Korea.

Yonhap / Reuters

17. The American and South Korean militaries.

16. These fancy-pants elderly gents are quite tired of Kim’s saucy banter.

15. Mr. Winters, high school teacher.

13. Any Korean War veteran.

This is Colonel Lewis L. Millett. He fought in Korea. This is what he had to say:

“We had acquired some Chinese documents stating that Americans were afraid of hand-to-hand fighting and cold steel. When I read that, I thought, ‘I’ll show you, you sons of bitches!’”

12. This Lego tank.

11. The ghost of Johnny Cash.

10. This hipster.

9. Clearly, the Japanese Navy can kick some ass.

8. Same with the internet.

7. And this happy Wisconsin couple.

5. This guy riding on a submarine is just waiting for the word.

4. Freedom eagles.

3. This guy somewhere.

2. Jackie Chan.

Kevin Winter / Getty Images

1. And as an option of very last resort:

So clearly, Kim, you don’t want none of this.

So stop this silly missile talk.

Because you know deep down it will not work out well for you.

Our suggestion to Kim is this: Eat a Snickers.

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