Mimicked someone when you had no other comebackSaid the phrase “I just think it’s funny how…”Said “why don’t you ask *insert name of person*, you been liking all their pictures”Have used the phrase “I don’t know her” when actually you did know herSaid something like, “Well on March 1st 2014, you said…” in an argumentThought of another point after an argument has finished so started it again so you can say itTurned your read notifications on so someone knows you’re ignoring themReplied “who’s this” to a text when you knew who it was that was textingUsed “K.” when you were madReplied to a text with one word answers to let someone know you're pissed offTaken the same amount of time to reply to a text as the other person didUsed the upside-down smiley emoji when you’ve made a petty remarkUsed a different happy emoji when you’ve just said something really pettyOnly ever used full stops when you’re feeling pettyBlocked someone’s number when they pissed you offUnfollowed someone on Twitter because they pissed you offBlocked someone on Twitter when they pissed you offUnfollowed someone on Instagram when they pissed you offBlocked someone on Instagram when they pissed you offUnfriended someone on Facebook when they pissed you offBlocked someone on Facebook when they pissed you offBlocked someone on all social media platforms when they pissed you offTweeted something hoping a particular person would see it and get madScreenshotted everything so you had receipts for future useBrought up something from the past because you were losing an argumentHad to decide whether being petty is worth it when someone was testing your patienceKnown being petty wasn’t worth it at the time but was petty anywayStopped everybody else from doing something because you couldn't do itTaken something back from an ex that they really loved and then binned it because you didn’t even want it, you just didn’t want them to have itDone something you didn’t really want or have to do just to be petty, like posted an unnecessary picture with a boy to make your ex jealousHeld a grudge for a long time even when you knew the bigger thing to do would be to move onSeen petty stories and, instead of being shocked, taken notes for future useBeen called petty by your friendsKnow that nobody can be pettier than you because you're the petty champAcknowledged that petty is a way of life and you’re happy to lead it
How Petty Are You?
You try to take the high road about situations and be the mature, grown adult. You haven't been inducted into the petty life, but there's still time.
You've done some childish things in your time, but you've kind of stopped as you've gotten older. You try to take an hour to reply to someone if they take an hour to reply to you, but you end up caving and texting back after 10 minutes.
You know when it's right to be petty and when it's best to be the bigger person and move on. You're not about holding grudges longer than necessary, but you'll get down and petty if you have to.
You are petty. So fucking petty. You don't care if it's childish, you're out to let these people know you're not falling for no bullshit and you can see everything.
Nobody plays with you because they know you're not that one to let it fly. Your petty is so skilled, it can take anybody down. You're the champion of petty and tbh, you're an inspiration to us all. GIVE US PETTY LESSONS.