1.
When you're trying to count how long it's actually been since you had sex:
2.
And you realise it's been a couple of weeks:
3.
Or worse, a couple of months:
4.
When you don't even know how long it's been anymore:
5.
When you can hear your housemates having sex:
6.
Or you've got to listen to your friends bragging about their sex life:
7.
And the same friends ask you about your sex life knowing you're going through a dry patch:
8.
When you get to the point where you can't even remember what sex is anymore:
9.
When you've been masturbating too much:
10.
And you've been watching too much porn but you're just not into it anymore:
11.
But you still finish anyway:
12.
When somebody asks if you want to watch Netflix with them:
13.
When you're chilling out with somebody you really want to have sex with:
14.
And so you subtly assume the position to let them know you're game:
15.
Or they assume the position and you can't believe your luck:
16.
When you see somebody hot in the street:
17.
And they've got a visible penis outline:
18.
When you finally get laid and you sit on the bed when you're finished:
19.
Or you just lay there in wonderment:
20.
You obviously can't wait to tell your friends:
21.
Who are supportive of your dry patch being watered:
22.
But there's every chance when you get laid, it'll be nothing more than a disappointment:
23.
When you've over-hyped your skills but you can't remember what to do with it:
24.
When the penetration finally happens after so long:
25.
And you've only been going for 10 seconds but you know you're about to blow already:
26.
But you're just happy you haven't forgotten how to do the sex:
27.
And then you hit that dry patch again:
