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Chrissy Teigen's Toilet Has Gone Missing And You Have Every Right To Be Confused

This is what Kris Jenner meant when she said "This is a case for the FBI".

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By now you definitely know who Chrissy Teigen is, so say hi and let's jump into this. After all, we've got a case to blow wide open.

Instagram: @chrissyteigen

Because Chrissy, and I can't believe I'm even typing this, has lost her toilet. Like, her actual toilet. It is gone. Nowhere to be seen.


I guess you're going to need a little explanation because I can understand why you'd be kinda confused (I still am). So, as always, it started with a tweet.

I got home today and ran to go peepee and you know when you’re so close to the bathroom so you kind of release beca…

You're probably more confused than you were 10 seconds ago but don't panic, there's more.

So now would be a good time to enter into evidence a picture of the crime scene.

As you can see, this is the spot where the toilet should be. It doesn't take a detective to note that the toilet isn't actually there anymore.

And obviously Chrissy would like her toilet back, which is a reasonable request. I don't think we're asking to move heaven and Earth here.

1. So what has happened to the toilet? I have four theories which I think are pretty reasonable. The first is that John stole it in revenge for all the times Chrissy has roasted him on Twitter.

Likelihood: 9/10 (a strong theory).
Twitter: @chrissyteigen

Likelihood: 9/10 (a strong theory).

2. The second is that baby Luna has suddenly started showing signs of magic, accidentally made the toilet disappear, and should now be expecting her letter to Hogwarts any minute now.

Likelihood: 4/10 (I believe Luna is magical but witches and wizards don't usually start showcasing magical abilities for a couple more years yet).

3. Thirdly, the film that Chrissy doesn't think should be nominated for an Oscar figured out she was talking about them and decided to get their revenge.

John said I can’t talk shit about any nominated movies so I will simply say Get Out and I,Tonya should win everythi…

Likelihood: 8/10 (there's only a couple of movies that are highly nominated so process of elimination would make it easy to figure out which movie Chrissy was talking about).

4. And lastly, Sophia aka the wigless robot, had something to do with it after Chrissy shaded her makeup skills.

Likelihood: 9.5/10 (that robot is out to kill us all and she's starting with stealing Chrissy's toilet).
Twitter: @chrissyteigen

Likelihood: 9.5/10 (that robot is out to kill us all and she's starting with stealing Chrissy's toilet).

Honestly who knows what happened to the toilet. This case will remain a mystery. But another question...

@chrissyteigen Ok but we need to know where you peed this story doesn’t have an ending!

It's over to you, Chrissy!

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