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How Bad Was Your Student House?

Do you have mice living rent free?

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  1. Tick everything that applies to your student house.

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    Your landlord has ignored the majority of your phone calls because he knows you want him to fix something.
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    Your landlord enjoys watching you live in squalor.
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    You hate your landlord.
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    Your rent is astonishingly high.
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    Your house hasn't been redecorated in at least 10 years.
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    Possibly 20 years.
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    It's cold during winter.
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    It's cold during summer.
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    There's never any hot water.
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    You have to run the tap for at least five minutes before you get hot water.
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    One of your housemates uses all the hot water.
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    You encountered a rat using all the hot water.
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    The house is infested with mice.
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    The house is basically a petting zoo.
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    You live with more than two people.
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    You live with more than five people.
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    There are more than 10 of you living in the house.
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    There's mould in the bathroom.
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    There's mould in the kitchen.
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    There's not one room that doesn't have mould.
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    The radiators don't work.
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    You've listened to your housemate have a disappointing one-night stand.
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    Your housemates have listened to you have a disappointing one-night stand.
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    You always have a cold.
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    Someone has stolen your food from the fridge.
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    Someone has stolen your food from the cupboard.
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    One of your housemates has left passive-aggressive notes around the house.
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    You've left passive-aggressive notes around the house.
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    The sink is always full of dishes.
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    There's always crumbs on the counter.
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    Your electric bill always appears out of the blue.
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    Your electric bill is ridiculously high.
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    One of your housemates has been sick somewhere that's not the toilet.
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    The smell of sick is still lingering.
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    There's a musty smell to the house.
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    All the tables have three legs.
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    You've moved out of the house before the contract ended.
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    Your mum has come to visit and cried for 10 minutes because her baby is living in a squat.
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    You're embarrassed to bring friends back to the house.
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    There's a takeaway across the road.
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    There's more than one takeaway on your street.
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    You have to get the bus to uni.
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    The bus takes more than half an hour.
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    One of your housemates always plays music too loud.
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    One of your housemates is a music student.
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    One of your housemates is a drama student.
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    There's only one bathroom.
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    The internet is really slow.
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    The internet signal doesn't reach your bedroom.
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    The back garden is just concrete.
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    You don't have a back garden.
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    Your bedroom doesn't have a window.
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    You rented the house privately and regret this decision because everything's going wrong.
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    You wish you could move somewhere else.
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    The drain is full of hair.
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    You're not entirely sure who this hair belongs to.
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    You don't have a bathtub.
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    Your neighbours are students.
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    Your neighbours have a house party at least once a week.
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    Nobody in the house can cook.
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    You're the only person in the house that can cook.
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    The cupboards are filled with super noodles.
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    You don't have broadband.
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    You don't have the internet.
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    You don't have a TV in the living room.
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    The kitchen is the living room.
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    The bathroom is in the kitchen.
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    You have a toilet in your bedroom.
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    You have a cooker in your bedroom.
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    Your bedroom is your house.
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