back to top

"Scooby Doo" Would've Been Better Without Fred Because He's A Fuckboy

Leave Daphne alone and give Velma the credit she deserves, goddammit.

Posted on

So here's the thing: Fred Jones is an A1 fuck boy and that's just the god's honest truth.

There's a lot to get through so just buckle up and sit tight while I boil the kettle, spill this tea, and tell you about Fred "fuckboy" Jones.

Adult Swim

Fred was painted as the leader of the group, but let's just get this right: the MOST he ever did was say some dumb shit like "let's split up and look for clues".


Yeah, how about we split up and go searching for clues on our own when someone's out trying to skin everybody alive, lol good one Fred.

Miramax Films

And do you know why he was always making the group split up and look for clues? Because he was thinking with his erection, that's why.

And he always made sure he was paired with Daphne because he's mid-key always trying to get it in

Poor Daphne Blake, who was just trying to stay alive and not get held hostage for once, had enough on her plate without Fred and his fuckboy behaviour.


What you can't see is that Fred actually just grabbed Daphne by the butt without her permission. Isn't it funny how he looks slightly like Donald Trump?

Remember when they all had a spirit change in the movie and became each other and Fred was excited to be Daphne for one reason only?

Warner Bros


And let's not forget that when Daphne wasn't around, Fredrick Jones was 100% trying to lay the pipe on Velma.

Warner Bros

"Dorky chicks like you turn me on too" wow we should've known from there Fred wasn't shit.

Like Velma even needed his validation in the first place. Typical fuckboy, giving his opinion where it's not wanted.


Talking of poor Velma Dinkley, she had the brains to solve every goddamn mystery and stop everybody getting slaughtered but fuckboy junior always took the credit.

In fact, Fred is such a lil' bitch, he not only took credit for solving a mystery that Velma cracked, he actually used it to get it on with Pamela Anderson IN FRONT of Daphne.

Warner Bros

At which point Velma's just there like "wow this shit again?"

Warner Bros / BuzzFeed

It's kind of laughable when Fred takes credit because the first sign of trouble, have you noticed he's always the first one to leg it?


Literally look at him. He's like LOL FUCK U GUYS EVERY MAN FOR HIMSELF.

This is Scoobert Doo trying to tell us "That Fred ain't shit, he's a fuckboy, listen to me fgs."


Scooby knew. He just KNEW.

And if Scooby says it, it must be true. Fuck Fred.

Warner Bros