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1. A rabbit garden statue so you always have a friend to enjoy a good book with.
Promising review: "This is very cute, it came is a nice box and was packaged well so it was not broken. It is the perfect addition to my fairy and gnome garden." —V THERESE WIAND
Get it from Amazon for $14.
2. Stars Wars tiki mugs for a tropical shindig that's out of this world.
3. A pack of cat sticky notes that are the purrfect way to keep your place.
4. A scary novel loosely based on the horrors of the Ikea shopping floor.
Promising review: "I love a classic haunted house as much as anyone. There’s something wonderful about an old abandoned house (or mansion or castle or hotel or insane asylum), dilapidated, decaying, overgrown, crumbling, filled with creaking doors, dark shadows, creepy dolls, and something sinister that whispers from the attic. But there’s also a place in my heart for a modern, clean, brightly-lit building that’s nevertheless crawling with the unquiet spirits of the dead.
One of the real selling points of this novel is the fantastic graphic design by Andie Reid and illustrations by Michael Rogalski. The book cover looks like one of the big, glossy IKEA design catalogs — with a few subtle and not-so-subtle differences to give some visual cues to the horrors within — and each chapter opens with a page from the fictional ORSK catalog spotlighting one of their products, complete with IKEA-style art, a faux-Scandinavian name, and upbeat flavor text. But after the supernatural terrors start climbing out of the woodwork after the seance, all the featured furniture gets replaced with medieval torture devices. It makes the story a lot more fun and a lot funnier, while still giving a nice dose of the chills to readers." —Scott Slemmons
Get it from Amazon for $11.45.
5. A cute brooch you won't feel cheesy wearing.
Get it from monochromatiques on Etsy for $19.24.
6. A cheeky swimsuit to take the sexy Baywatch look to the next level.
Promising review: "This is such a sexy one-piece. It makes my butt look great! I would definitely recommend!" —Alexis Haynes
Get it from Amazon for $9.99+ (available in sizes S–XL and eight colors).
7. Or a frilly-topped swimsuit that will ~leaf~ everyone speechless.
Promising review: "I had to write a review for this swimsuit because it is GORGEOUS! The material is great and it looks just as the pictures show with pretty, vibrant colors. I am now beach ready! I'd buy again in other colors!" —LadyG
Get it from Amazon for $24.99+ (available in sizes L–2XL and two patterns; also available in straight sizes).
8. A subscription to Care/Of vitamins, because the best gift you can give yourself is the gift of good health.
See one BuzzFeeder's glowing review.
Get it from Care/Of for $5/month (and free shipping for orders over $20).
9. A pack of pencils that create surprise rainbows every time you sharpen them.
10. A container of wasabi or black truffle salt for an extra zip in your cooking.
11. A delicate arrow ring that's a total bullseye.
Promising review: "I absolutely love this ring! It's super cute and the metal is easily adjustable for any size finger. The only problem is that you kind of have to play with the ring to get it to fit right, but once you form it to your finger it stays in that shape and looks adorable!" —Amazon Customer
Get it in silver from Amazon for $7.86.
12. Bow hair bands to make your lazy ponytail feel like a fancy updo.
Get a pack of five from Amazon for $8.98.
13. A hedgehog planter you may buy for someone else, but end up ~hogging~ for yourself.
14. A pair of best friends sweaters for you and your other half.
15. A toilet keychain because you know how to get yourself gifts that aren't ~shitty~.
Promising review: "Really cute keychain with a quirky miniature design. I got it for my work bathroom key. The metal is not as shiny as in the pictures but it does look like good quality. It doesn't have that cheap look many metal keychains have. I've dropped it quite a few times and so far no damage. I get compliments all the time." —Veronica
Get it from Amazon for $6.99.
16. Or if you're looking for something more practical, a waterproof stash container for all your tiny, precious belongings.
Get it from Amazon for $6.99.
17. A yoga shirt or tank with a tie-back that'll actually make you excited to go the gym.
Promising review: "Super, super cute workout top! I got the combo deal of the pink and white tanks and love them! Very great when you want to wear a top to cover up your front but open enough to allow air to cool you down during a workout! Can be worn straight down but I prefer to tie it! Very comfortable, soft and stretchy!" —Dena H
Get it from Amazon for $9.79+ (available in sizes S–XL and 11 styles).
18. An air freshener that's really fucking ace.
It's designed by David Shrigley!!!!
Get it from Urban Outfitters for $5.
19. A set of colorful luggage tags to make your trip feel like a tropical getaway, even if you're going to Miami....Indiana.
Promising review: "I love these luggage tags! I kept the pineapple and gave my kids the lemonade and the ice cream cone. They are nice, flexible, and rubbery. They include a thing on the back to write your name, address, and phone number. I like the fact that these come with a metal attachment that's secure on our luggage." —DawnBLOGtopusDOTcom
Get a pack of three from Amazon for $10.99.
20. A breakfast sandwich maker that cooks all parts of the sandwich at once, so you can enjoy a solid breakfast without the line at McDonald's.
Promising review: "I've been using this breakfast sandwich maker for over a year, and I really do love it. Whenever family or friends visit and happen to spend the night, they all ask me for breakfast sandwiches the next morning because they know how great they are." —Daniel C. Hatfield
Get it from Amazon for $24.99.
21. A custom ring featuring your name and your birthstone. Wow, you're so thoughtful!
Get it from MackenzieTreasury on Etsy for $24+ (available in sizes 4–12 and three finishes).
22. A cable bite critter that is both cute and functional — it protects the most vulnerable part of the cord from bending or fraying.
Get it from Urban Outfitters for $6 (available in 15 animals).
23. A bag of Death Wish Coffee for people who like their coffee as black and intense as the Grim Reaper's cloak.
24. A tea tree charcoal facial soap with the cutest packaging this side of the South Pole.
It's vegan, and made with all natural and organic ingredients.
Get it from Meow Meow Tweet for $12.
25. A unicorn notebook for a sweet gift you won't think is too corny.
Get the unicorns are real or doughnut notebooks from Amazon for $4.99.
26. A pack of Lelo Hex luxury condoms that both you and your partner will love.
27. A gummy bear inflatable chair sure to be a sweet treat after a long day of not sitting on a cool candy chair.
Get it from Modcloth for $19.99.
28. A subscription to Lunarly, a wonderful service that sends you plants, candles, crystals, and other good vibe-y items.
29. A Hello Kitty wind breaker you're going to love when the summer ends.
Get it from Torrid for $58.90 (available in sizes L–5XL).
30. A soy candle that smells like happy places and experiences. Some examples: Backyard BBQ, Books, Beach Cottage, Love, and Grandma's Kitchen.
31. A rocket pop purse you'll look so ~cool~ wearing.
Get it from Macy's for $78.
32. A fun lip tint you'll totally heart.
See my full review (#6).
Get it from Winky Lux or Free People for $14 (available in three shades).
33. A perpetual calendar pendant that spins to reveal calendar dates up to year 2060. It may not actually be timeless, but it sure looks it.
Get it from Modcloth for $24.99.
34. A sampler set of shimmery sea salt sprays so you can feel like a legit mermaid even if you're nowhere near the ocean.
All the best purchases are gifts for yourself.
Reviews have been edited for length and/or clarity.
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