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We hope you love our recommendations! Some may have been sent as samples, but all were independently selected by our editors. Just FYI, BuzzFeed and its publishing partners may collect a share of sales and/or other compensation from the links on this page.
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Get them from Geekskinunderwear on Etsy for $20.29 (available in sizes XS–XXL).
Promising review: "These are the greatest gift to give to a proctologist. :D I had two surgeons that had worked with my husband, so I sent these as thank you gifts. They absolutely loved them! It was a hilarious gift and worth the price! The chocolates were actually very tasty also. Would 100% buy again!" —Dawn
Get a box of six from Amazon $9.98.
Get it from Amazon for $14.64.
Sigh, OK so here is how this terrible thing works: You pass around the phallic device and each person spins the balls. The balls will tell you how many times to pump and where to direct the top of the device. After a randomly selected amount of pumps, it will "ejaculate" the liquid of your choice (hopefully water?). It's basically sperm roulette.
Get it from Firebox for $26.99.
It comes with three short straws, one medium straw, three long straws, two curly straws, and eight connectors.
Get it from Amazon for $14.14.
The listing says it's 12 feet tall but reviewers say it's more like 10-ish.
Promising review: "This was the hit of the party! Such an awesome addition to a retirement party. Great for photo pics and a fun ball to try to kick around. Heavier than expected and once it takes off with the wind, it's important to catch it or it will knock things over! Inflated well with an air compressor and deflated well also. Huge hit!" —Elyse Greenwell
Get it from Amazon for $149.99.
It comes with 10 different repeating illustrations that can be uh, enhanced with a penis doodle and caption. Players share their creations and can be rewarded with a medal from the reward sticker sheet.
Get it from Amazon for $9.75.
I have seen one of these IRL and confirm they are Very Good.
Promising review: "My Duds now goes outside when it's raining without a problem! Great price, I did a lot of homework before I purchased it and this price is right! It's really a clever idea." —Alina Gavryliuk
Get it from Amazon for $16.50.
Get it from LoveFrizzlesSmallPet on Etsy for $18.99.
It comes with four USB ports.
Promising review: "This thing is so funny and weird, but I use it EVERY DAY, and it actually works really well. I thought it might be crappy because it seems gimmicky. I'm giving these to my family for Christmas gifts, I like it so much." —Lisa the Kind
Get it from Amazon for $9.99.
Get it from Amazon for $9.99.
Promising review: "The coolest blanket I've ever seen. It's not a huge, queen-size blanket but definitely big enough for a throw blanket. Love how soft it is and nicely made. Worth every penny!" —Amazon Customer
Get it from Amazon for $28.82.
Army men not included, but you can snag some here.
Promising review: "I am a fan of Godzilla. I am not a fan of gnomes. This little garden sculpture is a win/win for me! Gardenzilla is well made and expertly painted. I'm very pleased. Gnomes beware!" —Mahala Marshall Rood
Get it from Amazon for $24.99.
Promising review: "You know, I know that they made this as a novelty product, but honestly, the crease in the gel pad is just incredibly comfortable. It simply provides better support than a standard mousepad with a single-bar gel pad. It's spread out over your wrist rather than touching only a single point. Really helps with wrist posture." —wordfiend
Get it from Amazon for $17.97.
Promising review: "Well, I bought 12 of these when I was drunk. I wasn't expecting to spend $416 on a gaggle of neck pillows, but the look you get in the airport — and the thanks you receive from children you gift them to — is priceless lol." —TylerTroup
Get it from Amazon for $20.99.
Reviews have been edited for length and/or clarity.