1.Dear Medieval Art, we, the citizens of the future, have a few questions about what's going on in your art. Take for example, these dickiduous trees.
2.And what's up with this ashamed man giving a (his?) penis to a woman who is obviously not feeling it?
3.Listen, I like your strategy. Offer the cat a fish and hope he'll drop your dildo, but I don't understand how this situation happened in the first place, or why it was committed to canvas.
4.And what about this sad penis playing trumpet?
5.Oh cool! You're wearing the coolest shirt in your closet, but you totally blanked on pants when you left the house today? No wonder you're so grumpy.
6.Here's what's happening here: "Oh! What's it doing?! This has never happened before!" "Really? I'm an angel. I see everything is this is certainly not the first time." "Well, what do you want me to do about it?" "You can start by cutting off."
7.This. Let's talk about this. I already don't understand your tendency to cut penises off, but dude, there's gotta be better methods for doing it.
8.I would title this one: "I'M HERE FOR THE PARTY."
9.And this, without a doubt, is some kind of weird fetish.
10.Listen, medieval artists... we've really come a long way since you were around making your "art."
11.Oh, I think I get this one... "Why did the chicken cross the road?" "To eat a man's penis, I guess."
12.Hey! Nice hat! Where's the party?
13.This man is obviously reading Fifty Shades of Grey.
14.We've all been here, right? You have a few too many, and you get a little too comfortable, and you kick off your pants before passing out at the party, and you're friends are all like, "This is verily embarrassing, Lord Ulric!"
15.This one also seems pretty normal. Just a lady riding a dragon. Also, though, it's a dick? Okay, I can't quite figure this one out.
16.And this one's got me messed up, cause I'll never have a penis, and I'll never know what it feels like to have one, but now I can't stop thinking about toucans attacking them.
17.What's up with this guy? He's all like "Yo. Scope this messed up dick. Pretty messed up, huh?"