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How Alice Jones Are You?

Are you just barely Alice Jones? Or are you a heaping serving of Alice Jones with a side of Alice Jones?

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  1. First off, how much do you LOVE Chattanooga, TN?

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    Never been, don't care to go.
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    Don't you mean Nashville?
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    Seems like a sweet city! I'd care to visit once or twice.
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    Enough to go 80mph in a 60 zone just to be able to make eye contact with the driver of a truck with Tennessee plates.
  2. How many animals have ~passed on~ under your loving care?

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    None, of course!
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    1 or 2... all goldfish go to heaven.
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    3 or 4, and they died peacefully, of natural causes.
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    Upwards of 15. (But they all lived good lives, I swear!)
  3. Speaking of animals, how do you feel about eating meat?

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    Love a good steak!
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    I'm strictly vegetarian.
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    I'm vegan. I could never taint my purity on an animal product.
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    I'm a pescatarian. Unless there's meat in that lasagna.
  4. Since we're on the topic of meals, what's the best time for some din?

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    5pm, right after work.
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    6pm, a respectable and reasonable time for some grub.
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    8pm, a little on the later side, but I lead a busy life.
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    11pm, right after my evening shower. Although by this time I'm so hungry I don't even have time to change out of my towel.
  5. Oh no! You completely forgot that halloween is tomorrow. What last-minute costume do you throw together?

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    A bedsheet ghost
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    A vampire
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    A witch
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    A Hershey's chocolate bar
  6. Finally, you're working at the forest service, and you get an alarming call. A disgruntled foreign man is concerned about seeing bears, and is threatening to fight one if he encounters it. What do you tell him?

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    Call over a supervisor. You don't want to be responsible for another bear attack.
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    Hang up. You don't have time for this nonsense.
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    You play dead.
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    Sincerely answer the man's question. Advise him to make noise and retreat, and proceed with caution. After all, this is a good, honest patron of the wilderness that you're talking to.
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