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The World's 13 Laziest Salmon

These salmon are bums. (h/t to McSweeney's for the suggestion)

1.

thrivingoceans.org / Via thrivingoceans.org

"Swimming is a futile effort."

2.

images.quickblogcast.com / Via jrudyr.com

"Thanks for carrying me. I was getting tired."

3.

blogger.com / Via taotauajer.blogspot.com

"You want me to finish crossing the road? Do I look like a chicken to you?"

4.

yunol.stes.tc.edu.tw / Via 5mcs.net

"I'm JUST resting!!! Sheesh, get off my back."

5.

blogger.com / Via albertan1956.blogspot.com

"It's too hard to avoid being eaten."

6.

accentinns.com / Via accentinns.com

"Can you work my caudal fins for me? I can't bring myself to bother."

7.

wordpress.com / Via cdfgnews.wordpress.com

"I'll spawn when I'm goddamned ready to spawn."

8.

alaskaconservation.org / Via alaskaconservation.org

"Do I look like I want to leap for you? Get out of here."

9.

wildsalmonkitchen.com / Via wildsalmonkitchen.com

"I meant to have the dentist do something about my teeth... Maybe I just need to floss more."

10.

mbt3th.us / Via mbt3th.us

"This was inevitable, really. It's easier to just be done with it."

11.

blogger.com / Via bigfishesoftheworld.blogspot.com

"I mean, he caught me. I'm not bothering to contest it, so I'll just have to live with the consequences."

12.

flickr.com / Via Flickr: slang589

"Look, SHUT UP. I can see he's right in front of me. I'll eat him in a moment."

13.

Via wolfnipplechips.deviantart.com

"Dude, don't act like it's so weird to just see a fish sitting there. It happens. No need to judge me."

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