The 20 Worst Times To Make Eye Contact

    Now that I'm thinking about it, I'm not sure there's a good time to make eye contact.

    1. When you're going in for a kiss.

    2. During oral sex.

    3. When you get lost in thought staring at an attractive person.

    4. When you run into your teacher in the real world.

    5. Through the stall doors.

    6. When your boss walks into the stall you just used in the bathroom.

    7. When you can't stop accidentally making eye contact with a stranger.

    8. When you run into an ex.

    9. When an old dude makes that one face they all make.

    10. When you're in the middle of a test.

    11. When you're trying to cheat on that test.

    12. When a stranger is just about to sneeze.

    13. When a stranger is eating.

    14. When a stranger is eating a banana.

    15. When a stranger is eating a hot dog.

    16. When a stranger is eating anything phallic, really.

    17. When using the hip abductor at the gym.

    18. When the elevator doors are closing and they’re not going to make it.

    19. When you open up your camera and it’s facing the wrong way.

    20. When someone is trying to give you their mix tape.