Christmas Time Is Here
Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas
This one is especially depressing when you know about the original lyrics.
That Was The Worst Christmas Ever
This one seems uptempo, but it’s about being dumped and making your ex jealous on Christmas. Plus, it’s got a closeted homosexual living a lie, so that counts.
Hard Candy Christmas
A Christmas song written from the perspective of lonely prostitutes. This one was manufactured to be one of the most depressing songs of the season.
The Christmas Shoes
A Christmas song from a one-hit wonder band called NEWSONG. It’s surprising that their career of performing schmaltzy, deeply upsetting Christmas songs didn’t really take off.
Please Daddy (Don’t Get Drunk this Christmas)
If We Make It Through December
Country musicians lead incredibly melancholy lives.
- North Dakota police have begun clearing out Standing Rock protester camps at the Dakota Access Pipeline site.
- Seven Earth-sized planets that could have water and possibly sustain life have been discovered orbiting a dwarf star, NASA announced today.
- The ACLU is suing the city of Milwaukee and its police for allegedly performing thousands of illegal stop-and-frisk searches that targeted minorities.
- #Peggygate: West Elm offers full refunds for the notoriously disintegrating Peggy Couch days after pulling it from its website and stores👏
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